I don't coach for money. I coach for love. That is what I train my student coaches to do. It is the most important piece of the training I tell my coaches that they have absolutely no business coaching anyone they don't love. It is our obligation to love.  It is our privilege to love them. This is not difficult. When you do the self work required to love yourself unconditionally, you recognize yourself in everyone. You see their pain and love. You see their sad story

It is easy to tell a client what they want to hear. Give them a rah rah speech. Support them. Love them. Let them stay small. They will love you for it. So many of us get so little support, that having a coach have your back can be a godsend. But are you willing to tell your client what you really think? Are you willing (from a very loving space) to tell them when you think they are lying? Are you willing to call them out

To unravel patterns that feel natural and familiar even if they no longer serve me or work for me.   This is what all of our clients who desire change are working towards. I was explaining this to one of my students who found it challenging to change her patterns.  She was acknowledging that it required intense effort.  She has a pattern of thinking negative thoughts, a pattern of eating food that her body doesn't want, and beating herself up for it. She has been doing it

Here is a recording of me giving an overview of the Self Coaching 101 Model If you hover over it, you will see the play button.  It's about 15 minutes. SC101 Alternately, this is an hour class I taught on the phone several years ago. If you click on it, you can download it. Download Self Coaching  SAMPLE MODELS USED IN THE RECORDING   First Model   C:  Weight is  220 pounds T:  I am too fat F: Frustrated A: Overeat R: Gain Weight   Second Model

Directing your thinking means to be aware of what you are thinking and then to consciously decide what to think.   For example.  If you have a large plate of food, you will need to stay connected by thinking the thought-I am at 1 I am at 2 etc.     This is the opposite of fogging out. Fogging out means you ignore your thoughts and feelings and let them unconsciously drive your action(overeating).   Will power is not the same as directing your thinking.   Will

Yay!  Good for you client!  You lost 20 pounds!   Congratulations! Nothing makes me cringe more. The type of coaching we teach and do at the Life Coach School is based on the cause of all our actions/results  (our thoughts), not the temporary change of symptoms. This is sometimes difficult for new coaches.  They want their clients to feel good, and they think they can do that for them. (They can't) Clients feel good when their thoughts are truthful and positive. So, in the above example, the

Change is usually why our clients come to us. The process of change most definitely will include dissonance.   Dissonance is "a state of unrest and needing completion". It is the difference between our old life and our new life, and the tension in between until the transition is complete When we are changing an old way of thinking and replacing it with a new way of thinking, the old way of thinking will have more evidence to support it and the new way of thinking will have the momentum.   This will

When we start doing thought work-we realize that our thoughts are the cause of our happiness or lack thereof. What this means is that we can find a way to be happy in most situations.     Often my clients will wonder whether this means they will settle for less than they should because thought work makes it tolerable.  What I have found is this does not happen.  When we are clear in our thinking and we feel good-we make very good decisions about our life.  Accepting is not