Don’t Explain Everything You’re Doing
When you are with a client, you don’t need to give them the update on every single tool you are using and why you are using it.
Many times I will coach using the self coaching model and never even mention it to my client.
I will ask them about their thoughts, feelings and emotions, but I won’t have to explain why or give them a diagram of the model or teach them how it works.
Sometimes the model is just a tool I use for my own sake to “organize the pain” of my client and offer them some awareness and some relief by showing them the relation of thoughts causing feelings.
I find that there are many times when sessions go much more smoothly when I can show the client how powerful they are by showing them how they are choosing to do the things that bring them stress or anguish. I don’t have to explain the mechanics behind it for them to understand.
Most of them don’t want to see behind the curtain. They want to get what some call an “emotional correction” by their coach. They want to relax into themselves with as little work and as little information as possible.
A masseuse doesn’t have to tell me what muscle they are massaging for me to feel better. They don’t have to explain the technique in order for it to release a knot.
The same is true for coaching.
When they want to learn how, they might ask or you can offer.
Until then, just coach.