Ep #147: How Quitting Slows You Down
“It’s a slow process, but quitting won’t speed it up.”
There’s only a very small percentage of people in the world that work on making commitments and following through, increasing their confidence, and increasing their resilience in order to create results they want in their life. Most people simply live by default, in their comfort zone, waiting and see what happens to them.
Some people get an idea of something that they want (and believe they can have) but never commit to it. Another thing people do is make commitments, write down goals, and then constantly quit.
On this second part of our conversation about resilience, we’re talking about the habit of quitting something that you’ve previously committed to and how that becomes a dangerous learned skill. We get into the thoughts and feelings involved in the process of quitting and how many of us justify giving up on our commitments.
Don’t miss this episode’s actionable steps that you can start using today to remove quitting as an option from your daily life and achieve your goals!
Grab your copy of our new Wisdom From The Life Coach School Podcast book. It covers a decade worth of research, on life-changing topics from the podcast, distilled into only 200 pages. It's the truest shortcut to self-development we have ever created!
Listen to the show
What You will discover
- Why so many people quit something that they’ve previously commit to.
- How commitment brings you freedom in your life.
- The most common excuses people use to quit.
- The combinations of feelings and thoughts that present themselves as quitting.
- How you can remove quitting as an option.
Featured on the show
- Learn more about the Self Coaching Scholars program
- Katrina Ubell’s Six Steps to Developing Useful Self-Talk So You Can Start Losing Weight Now!
Get the Full Episode Transcript:download the transcript
Welcome to The Life Coach School Podcast, where it's all about real clients, real problems and real coaching. And now your host, Master Coach Instructor, Brooke Castillo.
Today we are talking about resilience, part two. Remember, it's a four part series, and in this specific one we are talking about quitting. I love the quote, "It's a slow process, but quitting won't speed it up." One of the things that we are working really hard on in Self Coaching Scholars is making commitments, increasing our confidence, increasing our resilience. There are a very small percentage of people that utilize those skills in order to create the results they want in their lives. Most people wait to see what happens to them. Most people. Very few people decide to develop the skills of committing, the skill of resilience, the skill of confidence, but those are the people I'm interested in. Those are the people I want to help. Those are the people I want to work with: the people who aren't going to grip to mediocrity in order to stay away from suffering, but the people who are ready to develop all of their God given gifts in order to create a life that blows their own mind…because I think that's the reason we're here on the planet. I think we're here to evolve beyond the brain we already have, to evolve to that next level.
I've never been good in history, it's just never been my thing, but I was reading about how we really got to evolving when we developed language. I thought this was so fascinating because, think about it, we used to be born and we could be taught things that would make us more efficient. If you're born and you can't be taught anything, you have to figure everything out for the first time. It's like, “oh, if you figure out how to make a fire, then you can teach that baby how to make a fire.” As soon as we got language, then not only could we teach by demonstrating, but we could teach by talking and we could share experience and pass on stories. That's when we were able to take that knowledge and compound it into such a short amount of time of learning something versus having to go and figure everything out. I took a moment after I read that and I was like: that is so profound, the idea that we are able to evolve beyond our ancestors because of what they teach us…and our children and their children will be able to evolve beyond us because of what we teach them.
I find it very troubling that we don't teach people how to manage their brain. We don't teach people how to manage their emotions. We don't teach people how to overcome all of their self-created fear. We don't teach people how to overcome their desire for indulgence. I feel so strongly about teaching this, and I feel very lucky to have my podcast and to have it all recorded and to be able to teach it to my children and to be able to teach it to all of you, because I think if we put all this material in one place where people can learn it and understand it and apply it, then we can evolve beyond where we've been in our lives and we can pass that on. I have a huge following on my podcast of people that really, genuinely want to learn this material, and I'm taking it to the next level for all of my students and now taking the podcast, which is free, to a paid coaching program where we actually apply everything. We don't just learn it intellectually from the podcast. We don't just listen to it as entertainment, but we actually start doing it and we start making mistakes with it and we start getting coaching on it. That's what we're doing in Self Coaching Scholars. That's what we're creating in that program. It's so amazingly exciting.
So, as a group, we can evolve beyond ourselves. We can create a result that no one in our life, no one in our ancestry, has ever created because we can take what we were taught ... Think about this, what your parents taught you, what you learned in school, you can take all of that and evolve beyond it. Because if you only take what you were learned from your family of origin, you only take what you learned in school, as it doesn't apply to your own brain, you will just stagnate. We have to keep applying all of this new information to ourselves, and we have to keep asking more and more and more of ourselves. Remember, if we don't ask more of ourselves, what will our brain tell us to do? Our brain will tell us to seek pleasure, avoid pain, and don't expend too much energy.
When you take that primitive brain and you put it in an environment like this where there is a lot of things to indulge in, a lot of pleasure to spin around in, and a lot of opportunity not to expend effort, and a lot of ways to avoid pain, you will not evolve. Basically, to evolve, we have to tell our primitive brain that it is no longer useful. We have to tell our primitive brain that it's only useful for when we're in true danger, and that is very rare anymore. We have to use our prefrontal cortex, our upper brain, to create more and more opportunities for us to develop in the world by creating results. That's how we're going to blow up our own mind, make it bigger, make it better.
Today we're going to talk about how quitting slows you down. We're going to talk about how quitting is a habit and justifying quitting is a skill. What did I just say? Quitting is a habit and justifying quitting is a skill. I talk about this all the time. What we practice is what we get better at, so if you're practicing overeating, you're getting better at overeating. If you're practicing drinking chardonnay, you're getting better at drinking chardonnay. If you are practicing quitting, you're getting better at quitting. If you're practicing justifying why you're quitting, you're getting better at that. You're developing skills that will help you quit in the future. Isn't that crazy? So quitting is something that too many of us have too much practice at. If that's you, I'm going to tell you the good news. In order to quit something, you have to have committed to it in the first place, so that means that there's something inside of you that wants more. There's something inside of you that believes you can have more, so that's a beautiful thing. But quitting is your answer to that, and that's why you're not getting it.
Quitting sounds like a terrible thing for most of us because it prevents us from getting what we want, but there's a reason why we keep doing it. The reason why we keep doing it is because there is a benefit to it, but we have to understand it from our prefrontal cortex. You can see why our primitive brain would think quitting is a great idea. Our primitive brain would prefer we don't start anything in the first place. Our primitive brain is like, "Stay in the house. Everyone is going to die. Let's just stay safe. Is there any pleasure? Can we eat anything? Let's just do that." Your primitive brain is like, "Listen, get a snack, watch some Netflix, we're going to be fine. Lay in bed." Right? How often do we do that, you guys? That's not our fault. It's our primitive brain telling us, "Listen, stay in the cave. There's lions out there. We're all going to die." So, there's a couple issues that I see with most people coming to me that are wanting ... Most people come to me because they want a result in their life and they are unable to get it, right? So the first issue that I see for most people is that there's a lack of conscious planning. There's no future thinking. There's no commitment. It's just complete apathy and “let's see what happens.”
But here's what I want to tell you: even when you don't make commitments, you are making a commitment to staying the same. You are making a commitment to just letting life happen to you. You are making a commitment to living your life by default instead of deliberately. Creating compelling reasons and commitments, like we talked about in the last podcast, that's a life on purpose, that is extraordinarily rare. A lot of people do it in their late teens and their early twenties. They decide what they want to do with their life. They decide what career they want to have and they go get it. They decide they want to get married and have kids and they go get it and then they stop committing. They stop creating. They stop pushing themselves beyond their comfort zone, and they just stall out and they wait and see what happens next.
Some people get this idea in their head of something that they want, they believe they can have, but they don't commit to it. Or, the second thing that I see a lot of times, is that people make commitments, they write down goals, and then they constantly quit. They have no follow through. They don't take action. They quit, some of them even before they start. Some of them, the first sign of failure, the first sign of the need for resilience, they quit. They justify. This is the skill of quitting. They get good at justifying. They get good at making excuses. They get good at not believing that it's possible. They get good at giving into false pleasure.
Quitting is a false pleasure. It is an indulgence. Think about this, when you're running a marathon and then you quit and you get to sit down, there's a moment of relief. When you commit to a huge goal and you're not meeting it and you quit, there's a relief. The pressure is off, right? When you're running for student government and you're neck and neck and you're afraid you're going to lose and you quit, there's a relief. You didn't have to lose because you quit, right? Only you know what your quitting looks like, and I want to tell you something. You probably don't call it quitting. You probably justify it and say, "Oh, something came up. Oh, I was just too busy." Whatever, just notice. If you're trying to lose weight, every single time you quit, what did you call it? Were you really good at justifying it, really good at making excuses? "It was the holidays and then it was my birthday and then I just had too much going on," right? What do you use as your reason for quitting?
The first part in this series was making that commitment and having that compelling reason. This series is all about how quitting factors into that, and I want to tell you the secret. When you truly commit to something, quitting is not an option. You remove it as an option. A lot of people get nervous when I say stuff like this, and the best example that I use, for most people that are my clients, is the example of committing to a spouse or a boyfriend or a girlfriend. When you commit to your spouse, kissing other people is no longer an option. It's not something you worry about. It's not something you think about.
There's going to be tons of cute people. There's going to be tons of good looking men. There's going to be lots of opportunity, but it's not an option so you don't even see it. You don't even look for it. It's not even relevant. You're not like, "Oh God, that guy is so cute. That guy is so cute. Oh my God he's right here and I'm married and I can't kiss him!" Right? Cute dude, not an option to kiss him, so not even going to think about it, right? It's not even in my repertoire. Just focus on Chris, focus on my husband, and that gives me so much freedom. I don't have to worry about every guy that comes into my space. I'm already married. It's done. So that's a commitment that doesn't feel restrictive to me. It feels like freedom, and that's where we want to get you to. When you commit, you remove quitting as a temptation and this gives you freedom. It also removes you having to worry about failure.
So many times, we spend so much energy worrying that we are going to fail. The only way we fail is if we quit, right? So we're so worried that we're going to quit. We spend so much energy worried that we're going to quit. I say, just don't quit, then you don't have to worry about it. It removes all the worry about it. You're just like, "If I get to a point where I fail, that's when I double down. Quitting isn't an option, so I don't have to worry about failing. I don't have to worry about quitting because I've taken it away as an option. There is no temptation to quit because quitting isn't an option. It's great. I'm just focusing. The only time I start worrying is when I consider quitting, and if quitting is not an option I can't even consider it. Done. Freedom. I don't consider doing things that don't support the thing that I'm committed to."
You've got to get familiar with what your quitting looks like because you've gotten really good at it and you might even not recognize it as quitting. This is what I've heard from my students lately, this is what their quitting looks like to them: blaming the program or the process on your lack of results, and therefore quitting, slipping into unconsciousness, allowing yourself to indulge in unconsciousness, and not calling that quitting but that's really quitting, right?
Just start overeating, just start procrastinating, just stop taking action…telling yourself you're too busy, slipping into busyness is a way of quitting. Telling yourself you're too tired is a way of quitting. It's a very justifiable excuse, "I'm just exhausted. I just have so much going on. I have two kids. I have a house and food I have to eat. I just can't do it. It's just too much." I promise you, you can do it. You could double down and do twice as much. The last one is, "It's too complicated and I'm too confused." Those are the ones. Those are the excuses most of my students use when they quit. If you won't allow any of those excuses, if those aren't options: A, B, C, or D, all of the above…none of them are options. Then your only option is to stay committed.
Your pattern may look like this: you may commit to something and then you quit and then you despair and then you quit and then you commit again. You commit, you quit, you despair, you commit, you quit, you despair. That becomes your pattern, and eventually you'll stop committing and you'll just stay quitted. You know why? Because your brain will be so thrilled. Your primitive brain will be like, "Listen, this is what we should have done the whole time anyway. We're going to die. We shouldn't leave the house. Netflix, food, bed, let's do this." That's what your brain will tell you. "Why are we going to go out there and try and change the world? The world is fine. Let someone else do that."
I always get in this conversation with people that are like, "Why are you always telling people they should go make more money? Why are you always telling people they should go create huge, wonderful businesses? Why are you always telling people that they should go get the body of their dreams? It's all so exhausting. Why are you always ... Maybe people don't want to do that." I always say, "I'm interested in the people that do want to do it. I'm interested in the people that want to commit to it, and I'm interested in the people that want to stop quitting. Those are the people that I want to help, because there's a lot of us." We tell ourselves we don't know how to not quit, but we do. We just have to stop doing it. Not drinking is easy. Not overeating is easy. Not quitting is easy. What's hard is what remains, what we're left with, which is our emotional life.
That's where we bring the model in, right? That's where we start using the model to manage our emotional life. That's where we start embracing discomfort and, instead of closing down when the discomfort comes in, we open up to it. This is using committing as a temporary indulgence to feel better from lack of action and despair, but the quitting is also used to indulge in relief. This is how it works. We feel terrible. We know that we're not living the life we're meant to live. We get ourselves together and we commit. We're like, "We're going to go get it. I'm going to lose this weight. I'm going to stop drinking. I'm going to build my business. I'm going to make more money. I'm going to ask for that raise. I'm going to get that job. I'm going to ask her to marry me." Whatever it is, we commit to it. Then we get scared and we get uncomfortable and so then we quit and that gives us some relief. Then we stay quitted for a while and then we go into despair and then we commit again and that makes us feel better. Then that starts to feel uncomfortable and then we quit again, right?
We don't know how to be uncomfortable. We can't stand the discomfort of not achieving our dreams, and we can't stand the discomfort of achieving our dreams, so we just go back and forth, which is a terrible way to live your life. It's like circling the drain your whole life, never really going anywhere. This cycle undermines your capability and your confidence. Quitting feels like relief right when you do it. It disguises itself as self care.
Quitting can feel like a rest or peace, but quitting is always driven by a thought and an emotion. Quitting is an action. Often it seems like a situation is causing us to quit, but that is never the case. It's always a thought. So here are some thoughts and feeling combinations that are quitting. The thought, "I can't do this," the feeling, despair, the action, quitting. The thought, "This is too hard," the feeling, frustration, the action, quitting. The thought, "This isn't working," the feeling, apathy, the action, quitting. "This is a mistake," the feeling, anxiety, the action, quitting. "I'm not good at this," is the thought, worry is the feeling, quitting is the action. "I don't know how," causes feelings of worry and confusion, the action is quitting. If you can catch yourself in that thought, if you can catch yourself with your thinking, then you'll recognize those feelings, and then you'll know the action. You'll know that quitting is not far behind.
The way that we solve getting better at quitting and getting better at the skill of justifying quitting is by committing. We commit, and we remove quitting as an option. Here's the process. You manage your mind, you notice your thoughts, and you choose them deliberately. You anticipate the desire to quit. You know it's going to come. You understand the motivational triad, which means our brain is wired to seek pleasure, avoid pain, and reduce energy expenditure, so the desire to quit will always be driven by our primitive brain. We need to learn to manage discomfort instead of answering it with quitting. We need to refuse confusion. Confusion is always a lie. The thought that causes it is always a lie. We need to keep taking massive action and take different action as needed to create different results. We don't accept excuses or justification.
Now, if you are in my Self Coaching Scholars, you will turn to page 22 in your workbook that I sent to your home and you will fill in the work in the exercises that I have created there for you. This will reveal to you your quitting skillset. This will reveal to you the process that you do to quit, which undermines your commitment, which undermines your ability to create your own results. Know the different between failing and learning. Define the difference before you start a new project. Perfection is a miss for scared people. Be willing to do B- work to get it done, and refine it later. Resilience is your ability to get up after you've fallen down. You will fall down.
Think about this, think about this all the time…actually I have a whole video on this in my Masterclass…a baby, toddler, learning how to walk. The way that it gets strong enough to walk is by falling down and getting up and falling down and getting up. The process of getting up is what makes that baby strong enough to eventually walk. If a baby was just trying to always walk, walk, walk, walk, walk, they'd never be strong to balance enough. It's the process of getting up, pushing themselves up after they fall down. That is the same with us, mentally, right? The more we overcome adversity, the more we stop quitting, the more we challenge ourselves to bigger and bigger goals and then overcome those challenges, the stronger we are going to get.
This week, your study guide is all about learning about your own quitting process, learning to honor your commitment by not quitting, understanding that quitting is a temptation that you must remove if you want to achieve your goals. You will have to tell yourself "no" when it comes to wanting to quit. The suffering you receive after that is optional. You get to decide. That's what I have for you today.
I want to remind you that this podcast is the first of 2017, which means that it is the first time I have invited one of my trained coaches to come on the podcast and teach you a tool. Today we have Katrina Ubell, who is one of my coaches. She has also gone through my Stop Overeating Masterclass. She's also a physician. She's fantastically funny and fun and brilliant woman. She's created a short segment for you here, and then also she's created a handout for you that you can access by going to her website. Make sure you listen through the outro, after my podcast is over here, and then she will have a wonderful treat if you would like to listen in to what she has to offer.
The reason I'm doing it this way is, some of you may not want to listen to my coaches and I'm not going to make you listen to them if you don't want to learn. I think it's your loss. I've listened to every submission that I got from my coaches and they're all fantastic, but maybe some of you don't want to do that. That's totally fine. It's not a problem. You can just, right after this outro, turn it off and you'll get the same podcast from me that you've always gotten. I added it on the end for those of you who are interested in learning more about my coaches and what they teach and what they have to offer you. It's just an added treat that I will be continually offering all the way through 2017. I'm excited about doing that for them, as coaches, to give them some exposure to you all, and also for you guys to really get to know them and what they're teaching and what they have to offer.
Have a wonderful, beautiful week. Please enjoy Katrina, coming up next, and I'll talk to you guys next week. Take care, bye bye.
Hey, if you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out Self Coaching Scholars. It's my monthly coaching program where we take all this material and we apply it. We take it to the next level and we study it. Join me over at thelifecoachschool.com/join. Make sure you type in the "the", thelifecoachschool.com/join. I'd love to have you join me in Self Coaching Scholars. See you there.
Podcast Feature: Katrina Ubell
Hi, everyone. I'm so excited to be here. My name is Katrina Ubell. I'm a certified life coach and a medical doctor as well. I primarily focus my coaching practice on weight loss for those who work in healthcare, but what I'm going to talk to you about today applies to anyone who struggles with their weight. I first want to take a moment to thank Brooke and The Life Coach School for having me on so that I can share this amazing self coaching concept with you today.
This is something that affects most people at one point or another in their lives. I'm going to talk about learning to allow physical hunger in our lives and how to not let physical hunger spiral into an opportunity for emotional overeating or for tapping into our inner emotional child. Most of us look at physical hunger as though it's a problem in our lives that needs to be fixed or solved. If we feel hungry, whenever that may be, we need to find some food, quickly, to make that hunger go away. When the hunger goes away, our thoughts about that hunger, which may be negative, go away too. But then, there are times in our lives where we just can't eat at that moment for any number of reasons.
I want to start off here with a review of the different between sensations and feelings. A physical sensation starts in the body and travels up to the brain to let the brain know what's going on in the periphery. The body is purely sending a communication signal to the brain. Examples of sensations are feeling hot or cold, physical pain, physical thirst and physical hunger. Physical hunger is the body just saying, "You know, we could use some food down here if you get a sec. That would be nice." But a feeling starts in the brain. It's a chemical cascade that is triggered by a thought or a series of thoughts that creates a true physical response in the body. Those responses could be muscle tension, butterfly feeling in the stomach, sweaty palms, heaviness in the chest. We label different combinations of these responses with a one-word descriptor of that particular physical response. We call those a feeling or an emotion. It could be nervous, frustrated, disappointed or joyful.
When we experience the sensation of true physical hunger and we don't act upon it immediately, we get to decide what we make that hunger mean. That hunger can turn into the circumstance that triggers thoughts and feelings that cause the action of lashing out at the people around us or blaming others for our inability to eat in that moment or maybe the action of overeating, or eating off plan, when we do get the chance to eat…or the action of constantly snacking or eating a huge meal, even when we're not hungry, to ward off the hunger that might be coming in the future.
The result for all of these is either weight gain or the people in our lives can't stand to be around us when we're hungry. Maybe we're on an airplane and the options for food on the plane are not good, or our connection is too tight to grab some food in the terminal, or we're in an important business meeting and we can't take a break to go eat. I know when I'm home with my kids, if I get hungry and I want to eat and I'm in front of the, they of course are going to want to eat too. Then my little snack turns into them feasting for half an hour, which then in turn ruins their appetite for dinner, so I choose not to eat in that moment.
In healthcare, not being able to eat when hungry is a huge problem for so many people. Some examples where this is a problem are, if you are working straight through lunch because morning clinic ran over, or in the hospital they might be short staffed so you don't get your break and then you can't eat the healthy food that you brought. Or you might be working the night shift and the food options in the hospital in the middle of that night are, for sure, less than optimal. Or you're scrubbed in, on a surgical case. You just can't stop surgery and go eat if you're hungry. We find ourselves being, essentially, forced to sit with our hunger or allow our hunger.
Most of us find true physical hunger to essentially be unbearable. It needs to be fixed, so we usually respond in one of three ways. We may start acting hangry, which if you don't know, hangry is the combination of hungry and angry. We might lash out at other people, have that adult tantrum, really going to that place of emotional childhood, and then we stay there until we can eat. Some of us can deal with the hunger okay, but then when there's finally the chance to eat, we overeat to compensate for the fact that we had to allow for the hunger earlier. We might think we deserve to have food that's off plan, to reward ourselves for making it through the hunger or that difficult day. So we eat, and then we eat some more to make up for what we missed.
This was totally me as an intern in the hospital years ago. I remember taking call overnight and being so tired it hurt. This was before the work hour restrictions that are in place now. I remember just wanting so badly to lay down for an hour or two to sleep, but when you stay up all night, you maybe didn't get a chance to eat dinner, your body gets hungry. So I'd push through the hunger, trying to get my work done so I could sleep. Then, inevitably, I'd get the page from the admitting resident that I had another one or two patients in the ER to admit. Sleep was nowhere in sight, so I'd decide to go get something to eat quickly before heading to the ER. At my training hospital, all that was open in the middle of the night was the "coffee shop", they called it. Coffee shop sounds nice, but no. They did have crummy coffee, but also all manners of junk food. I'd stop in there and use the meal tickets we got as residents and get myself a Dove Bar. If you are not familiar with the Dove Bar, it is super delicious vanilla ice cream on a stick with this thick, yummy chocolate coating. It's very tasty.
Even though I wasn't hungry in that moment, I took a couple minutes to eat that Dove Bar so I could basically make up for the hunger that I couldn't or didn't act on before. It did make me feel a little bit better right in that moment, mostly because of the dopamine hit my brain got from the sugar. But the result I got for rewarding myself for allowing my hunger earlier was that I gained weight. Then it became a pattern that I repeated every couple of nights, so my brain then started to look for the opportunities to get that Dove Bar when I was on call. Needless to say, I gained some weight that year, that's for sure.
The final category is when we decide that hunger is just completely intolerable so we overeat ahead of time or constantly snack to make sure we don't have any chance of experiencing hunger, just in case. We grab a few handfuls of whatever snack or treat is in the break room every time we walk by. We might load up with a huge meal before the time comes when we might not be able to eat, essentially eating now for hunger we might have later. My favorite personal version of doing this was during medical school. We would go and grab a few packs of these individually wrapped graham crackers and saltines that every hospital floor has in the patient kitchen. Of course they're supposed to be for the patients. We would go and ransack this kitchen and stuff our pockets full of these crackers.
I remember the graham crackers so vividly. They were by Nabisco, red wrapper. They did not taste very good. We all had all our stuff in our pockets, plus all our snacks. But the thing about med school is that you are at the mercy of the residents and the attendings, who are your superiors. You basically do what they say. You eat when they say. You sleep when they say. You do as you're told. As students, we would pack ourselves up so we could eat those crackers if we were suddenly called on to assist on a surgery, had no idea when we might eat next. The phrase everyone always repeated was, "Eat when you can," and we did. We stuffed ourselves whenever the opportunity arose because we had that scarcity mentality of never knowing when we'd see our next meal.
What's happening in all of these examples is that we're letting a physical sensation become an emotional event, but that physical sensation is truly, completely neutral. True hunger comes in waves and it's almost never an emergency. Maybe if you're emaciated, but very, very few of us in America are emaciated, thankfully. It's just the body telling our brain that food might be a good idea right now, if it's convenient.
The cool thing is that our bodies are 100% adapted to be able to forego a meal or a couple of meals and still be completely fine. It's how we've survived all these thousands of years, through good times and bad. If we don't eat when our body tells us we're hungry, we simply access what my husband likes to call our "carry on luggage", or our fat stores. Brooke likes to call this "dining in". Our body realizes it won't be getting energy from food, so it turns our fat into energy.
We can choose different thoughts about physical hunger in the moment that are more useful to us, that don't make us binge eat stale muffins and candy bars in the bathroom. What I like to do is envision my body fat being used up. I'll think, "I wonder where that fat is coming from right now. Maybe it's my stomach, maybe my butt, maybe my thighs." Then I feel, at worst, tolerant of the hunger, and at best, grateful that my body has this adaptive mechanism built right in.
When I'm feeling tolerant of hunger, I keep on going, getting my work done. I make sure I stay hydrated because dehydration and hunger, not a good combo, really make you feel bad, and I allow that hunger wave to pass. The result is that I get my work done efficiently while actively losing body fat. It's totally a win/win situation. The next time I get hungry, I eat just like I do at any other time according to the hunger scale. I don't skip a beat.
The next time you find yourself panicking because you're hungry and can't eat, try on this thought: I can't eat right now, so I'm going to let my body use my fat for fuel. Or try a similar thought that helps you to feel at least tolerant of physical hunger. The freedom you will feel when you're confident that you're always in control of your eating is so worth doing the thought work to get there. It's so important to develop a really strong relationship with yourself when you're learning to allow hunger, so just for you, the listeners of The Life Coach School Podcast, I created six powerful steps to teach you how to change the way you talk to yourself so that you can start getting those weight loss results that you want now. To get access to these steps, head over to www.katrinaubellmd.com/self-talk.
Again, www.katrinaubellmd.com/self-talk. Thank you so much for listening today, and have a great week. Bye-bye.