Women entrepreneurs are told that we need to hustle, grind, and power through to achieve the level of success we want. We’re basically told to abandon our feminine energy if we want to run successful businesses.
Well, today, my guest and I rewrite the rules and tell you why embracing your feminine energy is actually key to building an empire.
Aprille Franks is a master community builder and digital profit strategist. She helps coaches, experts, and service-based brands grow online communities without burning out.
In today’s episode, Aprille and I dive into the immense success we’ve both achieved by balancing our masculine and feminine energies, and why all women entrepreneurs should tap into this gift. We talk about what happens when you don’t process your emotions, how to express emotions in the workplace, and why expanding your capacity to receive is crucial if you want to make more money.
Join me and Aprille for our 3-part course on the concepts discussed in this episode. Start embracing your feminine energy so you can make more money and scale your business with authenticity inside Self Coaching Scholars.
Check out the video of our conversation below!
What you will discover
- How Aprille and I both embraced our feminine energies to build 7 and 8 figure businesses.
- Why busyness isn’t what’s making you tired and what really is.
- Why Aprille unsubscribes to hustle culture.
- How leaders can learn to show emotions in the workplace.
- What happens when you allow yourself to feel your emotions instead of repress them.
- Why you have to increase your capacity to receive if you want to make more money.
Featured on the show
You are listening to The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo, episode number 353.
Welcome to The Life Coach School Podcast, where it’s all about real clients, real problems and real coaching. And now your host, Master Coach Instructor, Brooke Castillo.
Brooke: Welcome to the podcast, my friends. Today, we have a very special guest, Aprille Franks. You guys have heard me talk about her a lot on the podcast. But now, we have her live. And if you want to see her in person, we’re recording this in the penthouse. You can see it on video at the site, thelifecoachschool.com/353. Check us out. We look very cute right now.
Today, we’re going to be talking about using feminine energy to stop underearning. Now, my marketing people told me that we couldn’t use, “Stop Underearning,” to advertise on Facebook. So, we’ve changed the title to something that Aprille hates, which is Use Feminine Energy to Create What You Want. Why do you hate that?
Aprille: Well, it softens what it is, really.
Brooke: Well, it is a feminine podcast.
Aprille: Well, it is. But I think it softens what it is and I think that the point of it is women need to stop underearning. And we are utilizing and tapping more into our feminine energy in order to attract what we want. And wealth being a big part of that.
Brooke: So, on this podcast, we can say whatever the F we want, so we’re going to. First, I want to start with hearing a little bit about you. Who are you? I’ll tell you first of all – you guys know because I’ve talked about it on the podcast before. But I met Aprille, found out she’s a badass businesswoman in our industry, doing amazing things. I’ve learned so much from her. We decided we had to do a class together.
I flew to Vegas where she lived. We prepared the class. And now she’s here in Austin where I live and we’re doing a podcast and some video for you. But first, I want her, in her own words, to tell you a little bit about her history and who she is and what she does.
Aprille: Oh wow, my whole history. So, I’m Aprille Franks. I am a master community builder and digital profit strategist. I help women build online communities without killing themselves, in short. Online communities, I’m really passionate about people getting together and leaders galvanizing their own audiences and their own tribes and kind of creating this craziness, you know, of people that buy into whatever you’re up for.
And I think that that’s been a very profitable path for myself and for our clients and I really love it. I love people. I love relationships. And that really came from being an army brat. When I was growing up, my father, we were always moving like every couple of years. And if I didn’t keep in touch intentionally with my friends, then I wouldn’t have any friends.
So, we go from living in Texas to living in Germany, you know, with 30 days’ notice. And so, just growing up with that, it helped me keep in touch with people throughout my whole life.
So, you know how sometimes people have a hometown? I don’t have a hometown. I was born someplace, obviously. But I don’t have a hometown where I grew up with the same people. And so, that really instilled in me, how do we maintain relationships? How do you build community? How do you keep your people around a certain topic of interest? And for me, that really came from just being an army brat.
Brooke: Let’s talk a little bit about how you found your way to seven figures. Where did you start? What was kind of the trajectory with your career?
Aprille: So, it’s funny, when I first started in this business, I did a course with another coach. And it was really new. This was 2010, 2011, 2012 maybe. And we did this course. we sold it for $20. We had to split it.
Aprille: Woo, we’re rolling in the dough. But what we were learning was we were navigating the social space and automation and, at that time, MailChimp and what’s a Facebook page and marketing. And so, we were figuring out all of these things. And that’s really where it started.
So, the first year I was in, we did that course a couple of times, just trying to figure it out and creating workbooks and lead magnets and opt-ins and all these things that we were seeing in bigger players. And so, that first year, I don’t know, I might have made $20,000. And I was very ambiguous in what I was saying I was helping people with, which I really wasn’t saying I was helping people with anything. I was just really motivational and inspiring.
And so, my messaging wasn’t really clear, but I was compelling. And so, people were attracted to that. And they were attracted to my backstory, you know, dropping out of high school, being a teenage mom, all the things. And so, from there, I started to invest in coaching and became more clear. And that has just continued.
So then, I went from $20,000 to $75,000. At $75,000 I joined a mastermind and then that went from $75,000 to $330,000. And then it just kept going up from there. And the clearer I became, just the more money we’ve been able to make because we’ve been able to really address the pain points of our audience more clearly every single year. So, we’ve been progressing and it’s been great.
Brooke: Love it. So, what we want to talk about on this podcast today is how we, as women specifically, have used our feminine energy to build seven-figure, eight-figure businesses. And it’s a topic that I’m kind of obsessed about, and so is Aprille. So, that’s why we wanted to talk about it.
It’s very important, when you’re building a business, that you have your hustle, go-after, structured energy. That’s the energy that most of us see out there in the world with successful, especially men, building companies. But one of the things that we want to teach and offer is that the more feminine side, the more emotional side, the more self-care and receiving side needs to be part of that building so we can have balance and we don’t burn ourselves out.
Way too many people come into this industry, go at it 100 miles an hour with strictly masculine energy and burn themselves out completely. And we’re talking to both men and women here. You need a balance of those two energies. So, do you want to talk a little bit about – I know that for you, you’ve used a lot of masculine energy to burn through some of the work that you’ve done. You’ve also made a conscious choice to bring in some more of that feminine energy. Do you want to talk about that a little bit?
Aprille: Yeah, there’s so much that we carry into this entrepreneurial space, especially so many coming into it now. And we kind of carry what we’ve been conditioned to believe is how success happens and this is the way it’s supposed to be.
And the truth of the matter is, it’s patriarchal, it’s very masculine, and it doesn’t necessarily work for women. But we utilize it because it’s what we’ve been seeing and there’s not a lot of women stepping up. Like you and I are saying, “Listen you can be successful at all the things and you can still be a girl, you can still be a woman, you can still be feminine. You can still be in receiving mode. You don’t have to be aggressive. You don’t have to bark at people. Love Gary V, but you don’t have to be Gary V in order to be successful. You could just be you and still be respected.”
And so, for me, what I realized was the masculine had taken over so much of the feminine for myself personally. It was destroying my personal relationships with people that I love. And that’s really what made me take a step back and I went on a sabbatical and I just really started this intentional journey about tapping into the feminine.
Brooke: Yeah, I love that. And I’ve thought a lot about this because the way I’ve been able to build my business so successfully but also take care of myself and be in a space where I don’t feel burnt out ever, I don’t feel overtired, I don’t feel like I’ve destroyed anybody or any relationship along the way.
And I think it’s because I’ve been able to tap into that part of me that is empathetic and emotional and aware and balanced it with that very strong masculine energy. And when I talk about feminine energy, especially recently, a lot of my guy friends will say to me, “Well, I don’t want to be soft. And I’m afraid, if I’m soft, I’ll lose my edge and I won’t be as successful.”
And so, I find that really fascinating, that the softness, I think, is what has carried me through to be even more successful than many of the men who are trying to power their way through. What do you think about that?
Aprille: Yeah, I think – one of the things that a feminine worker that I had been working with when I started this journey that we talked about was, she said, run everything through – how you would normally respond, run it through a feminine field first. So, if someone says something to you, if you’re consciously working on this and you’re really trying to explore yourself, if you ran it through a more compassionate field, like a filter first, what would that response be?
Because the truth is, it’s like most of us. If we respond, that first response you’re like, “Man, I wish I hadn’t said that. Or I could have said that differently.” And it’s only because we just didn’t take pause. And it’s not that we don’t need the assertiveness and the go-getting and all of those things. But we also want to be, I believe, more compassionate in how we’re dealing with one another, how we’re interacting with one another. And I think that transcends male, female.
I think the feminine masculine energy conversation has nothing to do with male and female. It has to do with what those two energies, what that really means, you know, which is a really nice balance of all of the things. And so, when she said, “Run it through that feminine field,” I was like – it’s just take a pause.
It’s almost like when you’re growing up, your parents might have said to you, you know, “Think before you speak.” Well, the thinking, that’s the feminine part. And then that assertation…
Brooke: The pause, right?
Aprille: Yeah, just that pause is like, you know…
Brooke: So, one of the things that I think is one of my superpowers and the knowledge that I have and that I teach in Scholars and that I teach at the school is the power of emotions and understanding your emotions. And I talked about this on the podcast, but I’ll revisit it here. I went to a mastermind that was mostly men. There were two women there. I think there were 20 people. Two of us were women. Very successful entrepreneurs, all of us.
And we went around and everyone was saying, like, “What do you think you can most teach us?” And I said, “Alright, I’ll teach you about feelings.” And there was this collective groan with all of the guys. Like, “Oh, brother…” And I’m like, it’s the best way to make money. Understanding your feelings is the best way to make money.
And so, we went around and I asked them if they could name a feeling, if they knew what their feelings were. And many of them had no idea what they were telling me were their thoughts.
And so, one of the things that I think as women, tapping into our emotional lives and being willing to allow and feel emotions, even though it seems in some ways soft and counter-intuitive because it slows you down. Because you can’t just power through it, “Oh, who cares that I feel scared? Who cares that I feel sad? Who cares that I’m angry? I’ll just use all that energy and put it into my company.”
But instead of that, if you pause and you allow those emotions to be felt in your body, then they dissipate and then you don’t have that festering inside of you. That’s what wears people out. People think they’re tired because they’re busy. No, that’s not why you’re tired. You’re tired because you aren’t managing and processing emotions.
Aprille: They’re out of their personal alignment with themselves. Like, there’s no alignment there so they’re out of their personal alignment. And not only that. What people have to recognize is that that powering through, you’re just creating resistance. So, it actually is taking longer.
So, a person that is allowing themselves – and that word, just allow, just allowing themselves to feel, to be, and then respond as opposed to reacting, then it just creates a whole new environment for how you interact and deal with things and people and all the things.
So, that resistance, I see a lot of resistance. And that’s why I unsubscribed to hustle culture. Hustle culture, grinding, losing sleep, all the things. And I used to be about all those things. I was one of those people, like, “Let’s get shit done.”
And it’s not that we don’t have to get things done. But it’s that there is just a different way to go about it. And now, I have a question for you. Do you believe that the more successful you become, that we come to these realizations? And that when you’re in that first 100K, 200K, nobody has time for that. What are your thoughts about that?
Brooke: Yeah, I think your first 100K, you’re grinding and hustling. I think you’re in a lot of masculine energy. You’re going after it. But I do think understanding your emotional life and being willing to experience your emotions will save you so much time and energy. The best news is, you can’t get to multiple millions of dollars if you’re not taking care of yourself. You just can’t. You will be so burnt out.
I have so many friends that want to take sabbaticals, that want to leave, that want to check out because they’re exhausted, strung out. They don’t know they’ve lost touch with who they are because they’re constantly pushing away emotion.
So, I think for me, what I teach is that there is no emotion that I’m not willing to experience. So, if I’m willing to experience humiliation, I’m willing to experience failure, I’m willing to experience frustration, I open myself and allow myself the power in that feminine receiving, that feminine allowing is so much more powerful than when I’m in my masculine trying to fight through or resist those emotions. So, I do think as you get more successful, you have less of a choice, for sure.
Aprille: Or you’ll break down.
Brooke: Yeah, and so that’s why I always want to encourage everyone to keep going in their financial goals because you could stay at 100K every year and completely burn yourself out, versus being in a space where you’re allowing more emotion, which means you’re going to set a bigger goal. That’s one of the things I was teaching these men at this mastermind that we did. I basically said, “Listen, if you’re not afraid of emotion, you’re not afraid of setting big goals because the worst that can happen is an emotion. And when you’re ready and able to deal with it and become aware of it, that’s when your success – like, my success is so exponential.
Like, it just keeps building on itself because I am willing to not be attached to any of it and to allow any of the emotion. So, let’s give people a little bit of a hint on how to do that. How would you recommend someone go about being open and allowing in their business?
Aprille: I think one of the first ways is really knowing who you are. And I think that you hear people say that, but people don’t. They wake up – and I’ll tell you an example for myself. One day, someone asked me, what was my favorite color? And I didn’t know. I didn’t know. It was such a basic question. It’s almost like, what’s your favorite food?
And I was like, “My favorite color used to be purple. But it’s not purple anymore.” And it was because I had just lost sight of who I was. Just something as basic as my favorite color. And I had to really stop. And that’s when I started this whole online brand situation in 2021-ish.
And I was like, “What is my favorite color?” And that question drove me probably for about three years, just discovering, what do I like? Who am I? What do I actually stand for?
You know, because while you’re building – because, for the majority, these are personal brands. You know, the people probably that are listening are people that are the face of the brand, they’re the person doing the thing. And you can’t show up half-baked. And if you do, you’re going to burst, right?
And so, at some point, you’ve got to stop and say really, who am I? What do I stand for? What is this about? What am I about? What are my values? And so, I think really attaching themselves to those initial core values is a great way to start, exploring who you are and what you really care about. Because I believe then that creates the path for all the other.
Brooke: Yeah, and that requires – and I want to be really clear on the distinction here. There’s a huge difference between, “Who am I authentically? What do I believe? What do I genuinely want? And am I willing to open myself up to the world and be exposed to that?” Which is much scarier than, “What do they want me to look like? What do they want me to say? How are other people doing it? And should I be more like them?”
That, I think that requires the allowing because you’re going to get haters. You’re going to get people that criticize you. You’re going to be out in the public. You’re going to have that impression on you. Are you willing to allow yourself to show up?
Aprille: And I think that’s the scariest thing for most people. Most people, their biggest fear is being judged by other people about what they’re saying, how they look. And for me, I’ve chosen early on in the business that I would just be myself. Just early on, I would just be myself, whoever she was, is, and my own evolution as a woman, as a grandmother, as a wife – not a wife anymore but used to be.
And so, I had to make that decision that I was going to show up just as me. And no matter what people said, “Aprille, you shouldn’t do this.” I remember being onstage at some speaking event and I took off my heels. I don’t like heels. They hurt my feet. They’re so sexy, but they hurt my feet.
And I wear them temporarily, usually to go on the stage and then off the stage. And so, it’s been a habit that I take my heels off onstage. And so, I was with a woman. And it was someone I respected. And she told me after the speaking thing and me and her were riding to wherever we were going, and she said, “You know, you really shouldn’t take your shoes off onstage. Because what are people going to think if you do that?”
I said, “They’re going to think my feet hurt, because I said it.” And someone’s always on standby with some other slippers or whatever, or not. And I remember not liking that because I was like, “Listen, if it’s that simple for you to not hear what I’m saying because I took my shoes off onstage…” so then let’s fast forward.
I’m at the Opera House in Saint Louis and Oprah is on stage and I’m at one of her live classes. And she’s talking and doing her thing. And in the middle, she was like, “Wait a minute, these heels have got to go. They’re killing my feet.” And from that moment on, I said, “If I want to take off my shoes, I’m taking off my shoes.”
If someone’s offended by it, they’re just not my people. It’s much easier for me to take off the shoes and be comfortable and deliver a great message and great content and actionable steps to do X, Y, and Z than for me to pretend that I’m not in pain and having all kinds of spasms in my ankles.
Brooke: I actually love that as a metaphor for emotions too, right? For women, us feeling our emotions, talking about them being vulnerable and being expressive with our emotions as leaders.
So, I think that’s another thing that comes up for women, especially, but for men as well, is how much emotion should we be sharing as leaders in our companies and in our industries? Should we be sharing our anger? And how? And should we be sharing our sadness? And how? In our corporations and with our clients and with our teams. That’s been a big question.
I have a lot of women who come to me and they’ve said, like, “It’s challenging for me not to cry in meetings. Not to cry when I’m feeling sad. I’ve been taught that I need to hold that in and be stoic. Or when I’m angry, how do I respond to that?” What are your thoughts on that?
Aprille: That’s a very layered question. I think, for me as a leader, I’m very expressive in how I feel about things. So, I tend to not hold back. I’m also responsible in my emotions that I share, meaning I’m not reckless and I’m coming from a place of empowering my audience and not spewing or vomiting emotion, like I don’t know how to handle it.
So, typically, if I share an emotion, it’s because I’ve already processed those feelings, that anger. Because as we both know, there’s lots of things that have happened over this past year and people have had all sorts of emotions that they’ve bee sharing. And not everyone can constructively share where it’s helpful. Because I think there’s a reckless way of doing it where we can just say what we feel and you’re angry or mad or frustrated or feeling whatever. And that comes off a certain way.
But I feel like we have a responsibility, once we step into this space, then it changes. You can’t just be like, “I’m pissed off about whatever.” I mean, you could, but I don’t know how helpful that’s going to be for other people. And that’s, to me, part of it.
So I believe, I share when I’m sad. I’ve cried on camera. I’ve cried onstage. And also, I don’t think people need to confuse emotions with trauma or crying. And I think sometimes people feel like you have to be crying or there has to be something traumatic being shared in order to be an emotional person. And what you’re saying is feel. And what are those feelings? And not repressing whatever that is, whether it’s happiness, anger, sad, frustration, et cetera.
Brooke: I do think – and I’ve talked a lot to professionals about this who feel like sometimes when they’re in corporate situations that it’s not appropriate to be having an emotion. And what I believe is happening is when you are repressing emotion and not processing it, that’s when it pops up. And that’s when you’re reacting in an inappropriate way.
And when you actually allow your feelings to be there and allow them to be processed through, you have a much easier time managing them and sharing them when and how is appropriate.
Aprille: Absolutely, I agree.
Brooke: So, if you’re like, I shouldn’t be angry or I shouldn’t be sad or I shouldn’t be this and you keep repressing it, you’re going to blow up, or you’re going to burst into tears…
Aprille: Because then you’re mad because you can’t share, or you feel like you can’t share. So, then you’re mad. So, then it comes out like you’re, you know, attacking people. When really, it’s you.
And it goes back to that number one thing, like, who are you? And you wouldn’t be embarrassed to share who you are if you were secure in who you are. So, if you do emote in a meeting or something to that effect or you have a stance and something that you’re passionate about, I feel like that’s okay once you have processed your own feelings. The place to process is not initially with your audience or…
Brooke: I love that. I think that’s such good advice. And one of the things that I’ve been working on a lot – I’ve been talking to my boyfriend about this a lot – is the difference between having an emotion at someone or having an emotion with someone.
Now, allegedly, there’s one person in our relationship that likes to have emotions at other people. And so, it’s like, that’s exactly what you’re talking about. It’s like, when you haven’t paused, like you said, and processed the emotion, it’s almost like chucking an emotion at their face.
And it’s just a moment, an allowing and receiving of the emotion, letting it be there, seeing what’s causing it, and then talking about it with someone versus blaming them and having it at them, I think is a huge part of what we’re talking about.
Aprille: And you know what else pops up for me when you said that is this business world, especially the space that we’re in, has so much more to do with our personal development and your self-realization and actualization than it does with anything else. I mean, everything else follows suit. It’s like this core being, who we are, it needs such tending to, you know.
And then you’re able and you’re receptive and you’re open to coaching and the information and it’s easier to apply, you know, the stronger and more fortified you are as a human being, and the more in control of your emotions that you are.
Brooke: I totally agree with that. The other piece that I wanted to talk a little bit about that I think has to do with our more feminine energy is the being empathetic and listening and hearing what our audience and what our employees and the people around us are saying and thinking and feeling, instead of kind of steamrolling that for our own agenda. Do you have any ideas that you want to share about that?
Aprille: Well, I’ve been a steamroller. I have been that. And again, it comes back to the destroying the personal relationships. And I had to really say, “Okay, this isn’t working.” And even though well-intended – and people always talk about good intentions. And good intentions don’t mean shit. Like, it does but it doesn’t. The intention has to be followed by also intentional action to take care of.
And even though I was saying I’m doing it from a loving place, that still doesn’t feel good. It’s like when I grew up and my parents would whoop me with a belt, you know, “I’m doing this because I love you.” Oh, really? Oh, really? Or are you doing it because you’re frustrated, you know? I’m like, “Oh really? Because this shit doesn’t feel good. And I didn’t get anything out of it. This didn’t teach me any long-term lessons about the thing that happened. Because the chances are you did it again and you got chastised again.
And so, I had to really come back and say, “Okay, what type of person am I and where do I want to lead from?” But I also, Brooke, had to ask myself, why was I not listening? And where did that come from? Why did I remove the emotion? What happened that said this was okay to be this way in the first place? And it really had a lot to do with my upbringing and things that I had witnessed. And so, I was protecting myself.
Brooke: Yeah, and I do think most of us want to be kind. Most of us want to be empathetic. And as a personality trait, you could say I have a different type of personality. But I also want to say, in terms of business, being in a servant’s heart and being in an empathetic listening space will make you so much more money because your job is to create value for the people who are working for you and for the people who are paying you and buying from you.
And if you’re not hearing them and listening to them and serving them, you’re not going to create as much value as you could if you did. And that requires you – and this is one of the things that I really struggled with. A personal example of this was I didn’t necessarily want to hear what everyone else was saying because I thought if I heard them, I would have to do what they wanted me to do.
And as a people pleaser, I’m always trying to make everybody happy. I thought, “Well, if I hear your opinion, then I have to follow through on it.” The truth is, I can hear everyone’s opinion and then still, from that place of power, make a decision. I don’t have to do what everyone wants me to do.
And I think this kind of goes back to what you were talking about off-camera earlier was, so used to serving everyone else’s needs at our own expense that we hold that back and we say, “Okay, I’m not going to do that anymore.” And we throw the baby out with the bathwater instead of, “Wait a minute. How can I hear what everyone else is saying and then decide who I am and how I want to serve from that place?” I think that’s the big difference.
That’s where you can bring in that servant, feminine, receiving, allowing energy that can balance out with the hustle and the directness and the going for it.
Aprille: And I recall once I had made that decision, I recall listening to my clients differently. Like, super-intentionally, sometimes I’ll want to say something and myself will say to myself, “Don’t say anything. Just continue to listen.” And I’ll just continue to listen.
And I believe that it’s been more helpful. And my clients have commented that something was different. They’re like, “Well you just seem softer, like nicer.” I’ve always been nice, but I’ve kind of been a hard-ass, and I just don’t want to do it anymore, you know.
Brooke: Interesting. I love that. So, I want to switch gears here for a minute and I want to talk about money. And I want to talk about money being a woman thing and a feminine thing and the difference between the history of especially this country of men making a lot more money than women make, and women now really embracing earning more. What have you noticed? What are your thoughts about that?
Aprille: Well, my initial thought is women don’t believe that they deserve to make more money. They want to make more money, but they don’t believe they deserve to make more money. But it’s almost like a wish list. I just wish I had made more money. But it’s that internal deserving, like you should be making more. Because we’ve been shamed into wanting more. Like, wanting more is a bad thing. And somehow, you’re not a good person or you’re evil or you’re, you know…
Brooke: Or you have to become more like men that are making more money in order to be as rich and wealthy as they are. And that’s one thing that I think both of us are committed to, destroying that as a myth. Because it’s not. You can be who you most authentically are. You can be who you most want to be and create the wealth that you want.
And for me, the way that I do that is by providing the service and the value in a way that when I get paid for it, it feels like the most beautiful, balanced, exchange that I can receive with grace. And that’s very different than feeling like you’re taking money from people or that you’re somehow getting yours. I never think about money that way.
Aprille: Yeah, and you know another thing, it’s these simple little things. And you’ve probably heard it too. Some coaches, they’ve said things like get people to give you money. I despise that phrase. I can’t stand that phrase because nobody’s giving me anything.
Brooke: Right, it’s not a donation.
Aprille: It’s not, you know, but I hear men teaching and using those words consistently, different ones, and I’m just like, “Wow, no one should ever say to a person, “Listen, I’m going to show you how to get those people to give you more money.” It’s like, no they’re not just giving you more money. You’re providing something and they are investing in something. It doesn’t work that way.
And even those little things. And if there’s a leader saying that and you’ve got thousands of people listening to it, then all of a sudden, you’ve got thousands of people thinking that they need to be looking for people to give them more money instead of providing more value.
Brooke: Yeah, and I do think that when you’re trying to get someone to give you money, it almost feels like you’re taking it, right? And in your feminine energy, in the law of attraction, in the understanding that we have an exchange of value, you have to develop your capacity to receive and your capacity to have.
And receiving based on what you’ve created is a very different energy than going out there and take, take, take, take. It’s exhausting. And the other thing that I think is important to remember is that when you feel like you have to go and take from someone something that they don’t want to give you, you’re going to have all sorts of other guilt emotions, resent emotions, entitlement emotions that aren’t going to serve you in the longevity of your business. And I’ve seen too many entrepreneurs try to create businesses like that. It’s just not sustainable.
Aprille: It’s not sustainable. And it doesn’t feel good. After a while, it just doesn’t feel good. And watching that – and I’ve heard it. I hear it. And to your point with the receiving, it opens up the pathway – first of all, I believe giving opens up the pathway for receiving also. But it just opens up the pathway to expand, to have more, and people feel good about doing busines with you. And that’s the whole thing.
When someone invests with us, I want them to feel good that I had their best interests around that thing at heart and our team did and that we care about their result and not just that transaction.
Brooke: Yes, and I think that’s the key, what you just said. I care and love my customers, period. And they know that and they feel that and I’ve got their back. And I think bringing more love and compassion and understanding and empathy into our corporate businesses is the secret to making them more successful.
I think people think, “Oh, we’ll bring those things in and our businesses will be nicer and kinder places.” No, they will be more lucrative and more successful with that side of that energy consistently balancing it out.
Aprille: And you know why I love this conversation? I love this conversation because we are changing the way people think about how business is done because we all came from a place where it was done differently. And what we’re saying is, “Hey, that really wasn’t working.” We were doing it, but it didn’t feel good. And so, what we’re saying is there’s another way. We’re saying that you can do things differently and it can feel good for you, it can feel good for your clients and your customers and everybody wins. And you’ll be more successful as a result. It’s just the way. It has to be that way.
Brooke: Right, if you want it to be sustainable and have the longevity and have a business that you can be proud of and feel good about. So, what we decided to do was create a course. We’re doing a three-part course based on the concepts that we’ve briefly talked about today. But we’re going to be diving into some deeper concepts. We’re going to be talking about this in three 90-minute classed.
I’m just going to run through the topics that we’re going to cover and then I’ll let you speak to any of them that you want. The first one we’re going to talk about is receiving. We’re going to talk about receiving money, gifts, love, praise, compliments, and support.
We don’t talk about this when we’re teaching business. This is a huge piece of it. We’re going to talk about allowing, which we touched on earlier. We’re going to talk about pleasure. We’re going to talk about trusting, community, showing up. We’ll talk about anger and how that is part of one of the emotions of feminine power and how we can utilize that in our business.
We’re going to talk about competing versus cooperation, creation, and of course, we’re going to talk about money and underearning and how to stop doing it. This is going to be a course where we present our ideas and introduce them to you and then open up the conversation and allow you to give us your input. And we also will be able to coach you from within the course. Is there anything you want to add?
Aprille: Yeah, and I’d love to say too, I think there’s so many entrepreneurs out there that are struggling with earning more, struggling with things that they are intellectually able to do. And what we have to recognize is, it’s not that you can’t do it. It’s that something is standing in your way and it’s not just more content and strategies.
Yes, the content and strategies are necessary, for sure. But you have to recognize when you consistently hit a wall and you can’t meet your own goal, that it’s something else. And this conversation, I believe, is going to open that pathway for so many entrepreneurs to really understand that once they have this understanding that we have and they clear that out, that things will become easier to understand. They’ll flow more effortlessless… I can’t fucking say effortlessless…
Brooke: You’ve got this…
Aprille: Effortlessly. So, they’ll find out that things will flow more effortlessle… They’ll find that things will flow with less effort.
Brooke: Pavel, leave every single part of that in.
Aprille: Why can’t I say effortless… effortlessly?
Brooke: You can only say it with me. See, we need partners. I love it.
Aprille: They’ll find that things will start to flow a little more effortlessly and that’s what everyone wants.
Brooke: Exactly, and I do think there is more ease when you balance out the energies and when you allow your emotions and when you pay attention to what’s going on with yourself mentally and physically, 100%.
Aprille: For sure.
Brooke: So, I want to invite you all. We’re going to be teaching this class in Scholars. If you’re not in Scholars, make sure you get in there right away. You can find out more information on this class by going to thelifecoachschool.com/353. Thank you so much, Aprille, for coming on the podcast.
Aprille: Thank you for having me. It’s been so great.
Brooke: And I can’t wait to teach a class with you, we’ll see you guys inside.
Hey, if you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out Self-Coaching Scholars. It's my monthly coaching program where we take all this material and we apply it. We take it to the next level and we study it. Join me over at the TheLifeCoachSchool.com/join. Make sure you type in the TheLifeCoachSchool.com/join. I'd love to have you join me in Self-Coaching Scholars. See you there.