You are listening to The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo, episode 462.
Welcome to The Life Coach School Podcast, where it’s all about real clients, real problems and real coaching. And now your host, Master Coach Instructor, Brooke Castillo.
Brooke: You guys are so lucky today. I have one of my heroes on. Amy Porterfield. You guys have heard me talk so much about her and how inspired I was by her success way back in the day when she was willing to share her numbers online as a woman entrepreneur and teach me, really, that it was possible to make a million dollars a year. So, welcome to the podcast Amy Porterfield.
Amy: I feel so lucky to be on this show. I have heard you for years and years on this podcast, and so to be on it, it’s an honor.
Brooke: Yay, I’m so happy to hear. So Amy has written an amazing book, so I wanted to bring her on to talk about it because she breaks down so many of the things that people are dealing with who are considering becoming entrepreneurs.
And so, so many of the people that come to me at The Life Coach School, they start getting life coaching, they start getting help, and then they start realizing inside they have all these dreams. And some of them discover that their dream is to possibly be an entrepreneur.
So as I was preparing for this and after going through your book and really thinking about the people that need this book and the people that want to read it, I think you cover literally every single thing they need to know. And I don’t know of any other book that does that. So why don’t you just start. Tell us a little bit about you, why you wrote the book, all the things.
Amy: Okay. So I always say I’m an ex-corporate girl turned accidental entrepreneur because I never really dreamed about doing my own thing or being my own boss. However, I found myself in my very last nine-to-five job about 14 years ago. I was the director of content development for Tony Robbins, and I got to travel the world with Tony and work on the content that he does on stage, Unleash the Power Within, Date with Destiny. It was a good job and I was a good employee.
I liked the regular paycheck, I liked the fact that I got paid vacations and benefits and all of that. However, and I talk about this in the book, there’s this one meeting that Tony had where he brought in the best of the best internet marketers. I know Frank Kern is a friend of yours, he was at the table, Jeff Walker, Eben Pagan, Brendon Burchard.
He brought in these internet marketers and he said, “Tell me about your businesses.” And I was brought in to take notes. I wasn’t even invited to the main table. It was all men at that main table and I took notes, and all I heard from them was freedom.
They talked about they got to call the shots, they worked when they wanted, where they wanted, they were making tons of money, and a lot of impact doing tons of different things. Courses, memberships, masterminds, in all different arenas. And I thought, “I don’t know how they’re doing it but I want it.” I wanted that freedom more than anything.
So that was that first introduction for me to say there’s a whole other life out there that I know nothing about. So fast forward a year later, it took me a year to leave my nine-to-five job, I put together a runway, I started a side hustle, I started to learn what I didn’t know, I started to save a little money. So I had this whole runway that I outline in my book for people who haven’t yet quit their nine-to-five job and you need that runway. I outline it in the book, and then I went out on my own.
And it was the most scariest, hardest thing I’ve ever done. The first two years were an absolute disaster. I didn’t know what I was doing. So I wrote the book Two Weeks Notice for that very reason. It was the book I needed and wished I had and I couldn’t find anywhere. What are the steps you need to take to get started?
From content creation, to making an offer, to building an email list, your website, social media, everything to build a strong foundation in the order that you need to do it. So that’s the book I wrote.
Brooke: Yeah, when I think about your book and I think about what is the importance of this book, who really needs to get this in their hands and read it, and I was thinking about this. So I know that there’s a lot of people in jobs right now, and the reason they’re in the job - they’re not miserable in their jobs. The reason they’re in their jobs is because it was just the next step of life. It’s just part of what we do, right?
Everybody has to have a “job,” everyone has to have a boss and get a regular paycheck, and that’s the responsible thing to do. So I feel like part of our job as women entrepreneurs is to offer the option to other women so they at least know entrepreneurship isn’t something for other people. Entrepreneurship is an option for you.
So the question I came up with is why women especially - I know you work with men and women, so do I, but just because you’re a woman author writing this book, I want to focus on women here. Why women should seriously consider becoming an entrepreneur.
Amy: Ooh, I love this question. Well, first of all, if I just talk about it from a selfish point, like the woman who’s thinking about becoming an entrepreneur. What I want to tell her is that you don’t even know how good it can be. You’re living a life right now where let’s say you do have a nine-to-five job. You are absolutely going to hit a glass ceiling. Your time is not your own, and you will never create a business or life by your own design when you’re working on someone else’s time or someone else’s dime.
Also, I will tell you right now that men in the work world will always be beating you out. Not every single time, but the majority. I just read this article on Business Insider where men in nine-to-five jobs work less time than women do. They get paid more, and they work less time. I think there’s so many unfair advantages that men have in the workspace that women do not have that, sure, we can work toward fixing that, but to me, women who make money do big things in this world.
We can literally change policy. We can change how things are done if we have the money. It was so cool, I asked you one time about so many doors have opened up for you over the years, you’re doing huge things. Remember, you and I were having a drink and I said, “How are you getting all these opportunities?” And you said, “Amy, money talks. It changes things.”
And I realized, wait a second, the more women that make the kind of money they deserve to make, the bigger impact we can make in the world. And I think that’s important.
Brooke: Yeah, and what I meant by that is when I’m making $50 million a year, men are like, “Oh, interesting. I want to do that too so I’ll invite you to sit at the table with me.” And not just to take notes, but to actually hear what you have to say. So I agree, I think a lot of us didn’t even know the possibility.
And I think one of the things you do so beautifully, I think it’s chapter one, is you talk about - this is in my words, but you talk about why people could be very successful at it. People that could really win, especially women who could really win at being entrepreneurs don’t even try. And you have a list of excuses and I guess they’re reasons, but I look at them as excuses that so many people think are valid as to why they couldn’t possibly try.
And so I would love to just go over a few of those with you. What do you think are the most, I don’t know, powerful excuses that keep people locked in jobs that aren’t fulfilling their potential? I talk a lot about how we have our current ability and then we have our current capacity. And a lot of us are in jobs that we’re doing very well at, we’re hitting straight A’s, so to speak. You know what I mean? We’re getting paid, we’re getting good reviews, whatever.
But we’re at a good sense of our ability. And I work with a lot of doctors, a lot of lawyers, they’re performing at their current ability. But they’re not even tapping into what they could possibly do. And that’s one thing I talk a lot about when I refer to you is when you talked about making a million dollars, I was like, “Oh, maybe I have the capacity to do that and to consider beyond my current job.”
So, somebody is in a job, they’re getting paid well, they’re performing well. Why in the world would they overcome - let’s start here. What is the reason why they may not do it?
Amy: Okay, so number one is that they will feel - many people feel they don’t have what it takes to be a business owner. They won’t even use the word entrepreneur. I didn’t. That was way too fancy. So just to own a business, I don’t have the education, I don’t have the ability to get on camera like Brooke does, I wouldn’t even sound intelligent.
And so they believe, “I need more education, I need more time.” So they use that as an excuse and they never ever get started because of that. So it’s the feeling of not enough, I’m not good enough, I’m not talented enough, not smart enough. It comes up all the time.
Brooke: And you know why that is? I want to address this because for any of you listening that think, “Oh, that’s just unique to me and my ability,” it’s not. It’s how we were trained to think. We were trained if you want to do this thing, you have to take this class and learn this thing the way that I’m teaching it to you, and then you’ve earned the right to perform this task, to perform this job.
And when you’re in corporate America, it’s like, I want to see your résumé, and you need to prove to me that you’re capable of this job. And what’s amazing about entrepreneurship, especially Amy, when you and I started, I like to pretend like we’re the same age. When you and I started, there was no book to follow, there was no structure.
So we didn’t have to know how to do it before we did it. And I think that was the most important lesson I’ve learned literally in my life is that, first of all, nobody has to give you permission.
Amy: Amen.
Brooke: There doesn’t have to be a structured way to do it. There is now, and you should totally take advantage of it. But you can also try anything you want to do that you don’t even know how to do yet and make things happen in your life. And I think for me, that is one of the coolest reasons for entrepreneurship.
Amy: Absolutely. You don’t even know what you’re capable of or what’s even possible for you because you haven’t even gotten started. That’s the thing that I really want people to understand. You’re going to blow your own mind if you get started.
Here’s another one that seems so trivial, but it comes up every single time. I do not have the time to do this. I was just on a live, the question how do I find the time to start my own business, my own coaching program, my own whatever, how do I find the time, and I would love your take on this. What I say is you will never find the time. You make the time.
Brooke: Exactly.
Amy: What is a priority to you? Because I think they want me to tell them some really special formula of how you get 10 more hours in a week to serve your side hustle or whatever it might be. And the thing is if you looked at either of our calendar today, we would have zero time to start something new. So how bad do you want it? And what are you willing to sacrifice to take something out to replace it with this? What would you say when people say how do you find the time? I don’t have time, Amy.
Brooke: I actually think that it’s like a cover excuse.
Amy: Totally, right?
Brooke: I think it’s a cover excuse. I think it’s like, if I have kids and a full-time job and I say I don’t have the time, no one’s going to argue with me. “Oh yeah, you’re really busy, yeah, you really are.” But if you think about it, if this is important to you, if this is something that you want to try, it’s going to be hard on purpose. That’s the good thing about it. You want to get strong, you got to lift heavy weights.
And so one of the things - I just spoke at my girlfriend Aprille, you know Aprille. Aprille Franks’ event. And I asked everyone, what is your favorite excuse? What’s the one you like to use the most? What’s your go-to? And most of them, it was I don’t have the time. I don’t have the time.
And we believe that excuse and so we don’t even try. But if you just tell yourself I have plenty of time - Stedman Graham was speaking on the stage with me and one of the things he said was, “We’re all equal. We all have 24 hours. All of us have 24 hours.”
And so if you didn’t have that excuse, you would have to get to the more important and I think the reason why you should become an entrepreneur excuse, which is I’m not worthy. I don’t have anything unique to offer. I don’t have anything that is important to give to the world. You address this in the book so beautifully, and I think it’s really important to kind of note it here is there’s no new ideas out there.
It’s not like you have to be Einstein and come up with this great new magical idea. I created The Model, that’s not a new idea. It’s the same idea as everyone in cognitive behavioral therapy. I’m just interpreting it in my way. And that makes it unique. You want to talk a little bit about that?
Amy: I do, because one of the things why people don’t start is they said they don’t have a good enough idea. That’s another one. And what I say is first of all, you need a starter idea. Because Brooke, the way you started and how your business looks today I’m guessing is dramatically different.
Brooke: Totally different.
Amy: So take all the pressure off you having to get it right out of the gate because you won’t. You just need a starter idea. Action creates clarity. You’ll get more clarity on where you want to go once you get started. Another thing is I teach my students you only need a 10% edge, and this should get people to give a big sigh of relief.
What I mean by 10% edge is you need to be 10% ahead of those that you serve. Never teach anything where you haven’t gotten results for yourself or for somebody else that’s in full integrity. But once you’ve gotten results for yourself or someone else, just 10% ahead of them so you can lead them and show them the way, you do not need to be leaps and bounds ahead of them. And that’s why a lot of people don’t start. They think that they need to be better than they are. So that’s a big one.
But one more I’ve got to bring up why I know people aren’t starting businesses, they are afraid of what other people will think if they crash and burn. What if this doesn’t work? It comes up all the time. And there is a huge chance that right out of the gate, it might not work as you think it should. Your expectations are higher than the reality of it.
And the thing is if that’s the case, if it doesn’t work, my question for you is how high is your capacity for zero? So a capacity for zero is being willing to start from scratch. Let’s say you’re a nurse in an emergency room but you want to be a life coach, or like our friend Kara Loewentheil. Did I say her name right?
Brooke: Kara.
Amy: She was a lawyer. Yeah, Kara. And now she wanted to be a life coach. So she had to put her ego aside and say, okay, my capacity for zero, this might not work, I’m starting out with zero. Zero clients, zero social media, zero email list, zero money in the bank for coaching. I am willing to have a high capacity for zero and figure this out.
Most people won’t start because their ego is too big and they want to be great right out of the gate because they’re great at something else. If they’re coming from a nine-to-five job, they’re doing well probably. You can’t be great when you’re brand new. Raise your capacity for zero to start from scratch, to start over, and you will win. I really do believe that.
Brooke: Listen, if you feel like you can relate to what she’s saying, it’s because this is what we were trained. We’re trained not to fail, we’re trained to be good, get straight A’s, perform perfectly. Listen, I just started playing pickleball. You guys know I’m obsessed with this sport right now.
Amy: She is obsessed, my friend.
Brooke: Obsessed with this sport. It’s so fun. But I’m a beginner at it. My capacity for zero is zero. It’s high because - and in my first book, I wrote this whole chapter called Be Willing to Suck at It, Be Willing to Be Bad at It. Now, that does not mean hiding from it. That means actually falling on your face with the racket in your hand when you’re trying to get a ball that should be easily hit.
And so many games you lose at, and you lose, and you lose. And the question is are you willing to stay long enough? Now, that I think is a reason for entrepreneurship, is to see what you are made of. And I think so many of us don’t give ourselves the chance to see what we’re made of because we’re too afraid of that. We’re too afraid to fail. We want to get an A out of the gate because that’s what we’ve been trained to do. So we got to turn it back and say be willing to get a bunch of Fs and then after that, B- is fine.
Amy: B- is fine. Yes, I love that.
Brooke: It’s so good. Okay, so I want to talk a little bit about - so Amy talks about in her book, the way that it’s laid out is so perfect. She basically talks about the decision to want to be an entrepreneur, and then the decision to leave your job and how to go through that process, which so many of my students struggle with.
Should I just quit? Should I do what you say is create a runway for it, how do I tell my boss? What should I share? You talk about that in detail, which is so perfect because I think so many people kind of need some guidance there, and it’s something that you did. You went through that process.
But then you talk about the very specific tactical things that we need to do in order to start collecting money, which is what being an entrepreneur is, my friends. We’re not talking about creating a hobby. We’re talking about setting up the structures that we need. The website, the social media, the email list, all of the structures that we need, she talks about them in detail.
So if you’re a beginner, I mean, it really does lay out the blueprint so beautifully. And for me, I remember when I was first starting, you really taught me that in terms of ads. You used to have a course that taught Facebook ads.
Amy: Yes.
Brooke: And when I first took that course, it was kind of like, I can’t do this, this is too hard. I mean, Facebook ads are hard. There are so many little details that you have to do. But I’m so glad that I went through that entire process to be able to - I don’t do ads anymore, but I know that process. So I love that you’ve laid it out in there.
But one of the things that you talk about structurally that I want to talk about, it’s a tactic but it’s also a strategy is finding out your avatar. Who is the person that you’re actually going to be selling to? Can you talk a little bit about that process?
Amy: Yes. So, when you start to create your offers and this is what I want to do and this is how I want to coach, if you don’t know who you want to coach, the person you want to work with, everything is difficult. And what I mean by that is writing social media copy, coming up with your Instagram reels, writing email copy, creating a lead magnet to grow your email list, writing a sales page. All of that is very confusing. And then when you do put it out there, it doesn’t land because it’s typically too vanilla. It’s for everyone and not for someone specific.
Brooke: But I want it to be for everyone. I want to help everyone. That’s what I hear all the time.
Amy: All the time. Here’s the trickiest thing I ever learned, and now that I teach. When you are for everyone, you are for no one. However, when you drill down on who you want to serve, you’re also going to attract people that don’t necessarily fit in that, but they like you and they want to work with you. And that is beautiful.
Just focus on who you serve, and the right people, whether they’re in or out of that bubble will find you. It’s kind of like magic so it’s kind of hard to explain, but it’s genuinely what happens.
Brooke: Yes, and you talk about that but I’m so happy to have this book to refer people to now to talk about the process of discovering who your avatar is and why you want. Because if I say to you, “Okay, go find everyone,” you don’t even know how to do that. If I say, “Go find a woman who’s struggling with overdrinking, go find a woman who is struggling with her weight in terms of emotional overeating,” all of a sudden, you have a map. You have a way to go, you know what to talk to them about.
Amy: You know exactly what to talk about. And one of the easiest ways - you don’t have to do it this way, but one of the easiest ways to find out who you serve is to ask yourself, “Do I want to serve somebody who was me but I may be five years ahead? I was an overdrinker and I’m not anymore.” I think you do this so beautifully. You’ve lived the life of many of the coaches that you serve.
Brooke: Exactly, yes.
Amy: And I think that’s one of the easiest ways to find your avatar. It doesn’t have to be that way. One of my students, he’s 30-years-old and he teaches women who are in their 50s how to get fit. He wasn’t that.
Brooke: I love it.
Amy: So there’s no rules here. That’s the most beautiful thing of entrepreneurship. You make the rules. But it is an easy way to find your avatar. And one more thing I want you to think about is when you’re writing copy, when you’re putting out messages for her, if you know who she is, she’s that woman who’s struggling at night with overdrinking, you literally will start to tell her story in everything you do.
And the minute you get the email, the DM that says, “I feel like you’re talking just to me,” or, “You’re in my head,” ding, ding, ding, you have hit it. That is the holy grail comment you can get. You know you’re in your zone. You’re not going to get it right away but it will come.
Brooke: Yes. And I think another reason to have your avatar, to know who exactly you’re serving dialed in and have this virtual emotional relationship with her is any time - and I know this is probably true for you too. Any time I’m starting to feel sorry for myself, or I’m starting to feel like this is too hard, or I’m starting to feel like I’m tired or this isn’t working, I think, is there someone that I could be helping right now instead of complaining, instead of feeling sorry for myself?
And I ask this to my clients too. Literally, could you help someone with a problem that they have right now and you’re not because you’re over here whining about this or that thing? And it snaps me right out of it. I’m like, I got to go find her. There are people that don’t understand how to manage their thoughts. There are women that are in jobs they hate that haven’t even considered the possibility of entrepreneurship because they haven’t read this book.
So for me, that’s one of the things why having a specific avatar, because I can think about her because she was me. And I also want to say to your point earlier about how it doesn’t have to be you, oftentimes it is because it’s so easy to talk about those things and we have an affinity for the struggles that we’ve overcome.
But I was talking to my godson who’s dying to become an entrepreneur and he said, “I want to teach financial services.” He’s 22. And I said, “Dude.” He said, “I think it’ll be great. I’ll teach teenagers how to manage their money.” And I was like, “First of all, teenagers don’t have any money and they don’t care about managing their money at all.”
So you have to think about that. But I asked him, I said, “What do you have as a 22-year-old that people that are older than you that have money don’t have?” And he said, “Time.” He has time. They don’t have time. I’m like, “What could you do that you have time to do that they don’t?” And it just completely changed his perspective.
So now he’s serving people that are actually further along than him in success and in money and that sort of thing, but he has time. And that’s one thing I told him, I said, “I don’t have time to help those people. You’re not even going to be competing with me because you already win. You already win in that area.”
So I think that’s the other thing you have to think about. Where are you in your life? What do you have? For many of you it is time in the beginning, where you can serve someone and you could help take - that’s our most valuable asset. You can help take stuff off their plate, and that’s how we started. I started doing a lot of one-on-one in the beginning and even consulting and done-for-you stuff in the beginning to be able to learn.
Amy: I think it’s a great place to start. Anyone listening, coaching is perfect for that. The one-on-one coaching. People pay a premium to get that one-on-one. They ask me for it all the time. So I feel like most people listening right now are in a really beautiful position to easily start because of that.
Brooke: Yeah. And so if you’re sitting there going, “Well, I’m not Amy Porterfield,” yeah, you’re not, and that makes you unique. Because what you have is time to be able to dedicate to maybe your client, to be able to work with them one-on-one that Amy doesn’t have.
The other thing I want to say about that is me and Amy can be teaching the exact same thing and we’re going to attract a different person that is going to want that same thing because we’re mixing the material with us as a human.
Amy: I’m so glad you brought this up. So first of all, you and I are the perfect example. Those of you who know us that are listening, you would say Brooke and I are absolutely polar opposite. Brooke is wild and crazy and fun, I am not those things. I wish I was. That’s why I envy her so many times when she tells me all her good stories.
But our personalities are dramatically different, but you’re right, we could teach the exact same thing, people would be attracted to you that aren’t attracted to me, and vice versa. Happens all the time. So there are so many people listening, this is another reason why people don’t get started. I love that question you asked earlier. It’s a perfect episode in itself.
That “Amy, I can’t be that type of life coach because it’s already being done and it’s being done by someone that’s doing it really well.” So they literally think there is not room for them in a world of seven billion plus people. And what I want to say is exactly what you said. No one will do it quite like Brooke does it, no one will do it quite like me, and the listener, whoever you are, no one’s going to do it quite like you.
We don’t have your stories, experience, life experience. But also, you only need a sliver of the internet to pay attention to make bank and make a big impact. A sliver. Meaning you don’t need 100,000 clients to make a lot of money. You need a handful of them to be doing really well. Let’s put this in perspective.
So number one, you don’t need huge numbers to be successful. Number two, because somebody else is doing it really well and making great money and making an impact, that is a great validator that you should do it too.
Brooke: Yes. When I first started I was in weight loss, emotional eating. And I wanted to write this book, If I’m So Smart, Why Can’t I Lose Weight? And I kept trying to get a publisher to publish it. And the feedback I was getting is we don’t need another weight loss book. And I believed them. We didn’t need another weight loss book.
So I ended up publishing it myself and putting it out there and I will never forget this girl Rhonda wrote me a letter after she read my book and was like, “I have tried everything.” She goes, “I literally saw my mother have open heart surgery because of obesity, that didn’t convince me. But after I read your book, I lost 100 pounds.”
And I remember thinking in my mind like, the world did need another weight loss book. Rhonda needed another weight loss book. And even if there’s just one person that could hear your voice in your way and have that impact, that’s the sliver that you’re talking about. And then she’s going to tell a friend, and then they’re going to tell a friend, and you’ll have your little corner of the internet where you will be serving the world.
And I think that’s the beauty of entrepreneurship. I love working with individual entrepreneurs. I feel like instead of a huge big company, a huge big corporation, I can get that one-on-one connection and certain things that I want. So that’s so great.
Amy: It’s a beautiful opportunity, I agree.
Brooke: Okay, we have to talk about ugly websites. Because I mean, yours was ugly but I’m pretty sure mine was worse.
Amy: You think so? Okay, in the book I show a picture of my ugly website and I say that I made a million dollars with one of the ugliest websites on the planet. And the reason I bring this up in the book, and in the book I talk about what you need on a website, let’s not get fancy, no bells and whistles, let’s just get it done. And today, because we came on the scene so long ago, it’s so much easier to get a website up in a day than it was for us.
Brooke: That looks great.
Amy: It looks great, yes. So there are solutions. But the reason I wrote this chapter specifically is to say that there are entrepreneurial rabbit holes where you’re going to actually go down them, business card, website, branding…
Brooke: Oh no. You can spend weeks on a business card. Weeks.
Amy: Let me just tell you about my first business card. I was adamant I needed a business card. I worked on it forever. I wanted it square, not rectangle because that’s going to be sexier. I wanted it metallic, silver and red, and it looked amazing. I get them out, I start taking them out at a conference and I’m thinking, “I’m handing out condom wrappers.” These look like condom wrappers. And I was mortified.
Thousands of dollars and tons of hours, I had no clients for the record. I had no business spending my time there and I did. So why do we do this? Why do we spend things on look of the website, the business cards, the stuff that doesn’t matter? It’s because we’re procrastinating and because we’re scared to go after what we really want and put ourselves out there. And so it really is fear.
Brooke: And I mean, listen, I think there’s something about having a business card that makes you feel like a business owner. I get that. And I think your website can do that same thing. But there’s my website has to be perfect and I remember when I posted my first blog post. It was on Blogger.com.
I will never forget how scared I was. I’d publish it, unpublish it, publish it, unpublish it. No one was reading it. No one could even find it on the internet. But I was so freaked out. So just know that all your stuff can be ugly, your stuff can be B- work, and you can still make so much money. My website was made on GoDaddy literally by me. I was wearing a grey suit with yellow heels.
Amy: Sexy.
Brooke: Sitting on a plaid stool. What is happening? What is happening? And I made so much money. This is the thing; and you talk about this book, it’s so important. It’s not about you. It’s about your client. Your client doesn’t care how do you look, what are you doing, is this professional. They are like, can you help me? And if I think you can help me lose weight or you can help me make money or you can help me start a business, that’s what matters.
And so yes, make yourself pretty, make your website pretty. Give yourself a limited timeframe. Follow the guidelines that Amy gives you in the book because otherwise you will spend all your time doing stuff that won’t make you money.
Amy: Yeah. In the book I’m going to encourage you around a few things to cut bait. You get one week to work on this and then we’re going to cut bait and we’re going to keep going on. I wanted to mention something that you brought up. You know how most people aren’t going to get started because they’re very worried about what other people will say?
I’m going to put up a website and people are going to say it’s ugly, so I’m not going to put out the website. That kind of thing. I recently was reminded that anyone who is more successful than you that’s actually gone through the path of success, they made it happen, anyone who’s actually done it where you want to get to will never ever leave a negative comment about you online. Brooke, would you ever go to someone who’s just starting out and be like, “Your website is ugly?”
Brooke: Yeah, that’s what Amy and I do. We sit on Instagram and just make negative comments about people’s posts.
Amy: Exactly. Consider the source. Anyone who’s going to say anything about you is likely just afraid that they can’t do it so they’re jealous and whatever. We have to consider the source. Because even with websites and business cards, we’re all looking to be legit. You’re legit already for just being…
Brooke: Yes.
Amy: You already have what you need. So let’s stop spending time on stuff that is absolutely wasting your time.
Brooke: And listen, you have to learn how to deal with people judging you. It is one of the best skills that you can develop. People are going to judge you wrongly, and people are going to judge you rightly. You’re going to make a lot of mistakes and people are going to point that out and you’re going to feel bad. Get used to it. It’s part of the deal.
But for me, that’s the best part of the deal is learning how to deal with the struggle of being a human being by putting yourself out there in the world. And I’ll tell you, the payoff to be able to help people is worth any judgment along the way.
Amy: It is.
Brooke: It truly is. So if you’re trying to avoid judgment and be perfect, you’re going to make your life so much harder than necessary.
Amy: Absolutely. But tell me this real fast Brooke, I’m always asking Brooke what she would do in certain situations. You now make tons and tons of money, but let’s say when you were making $300,000 and someone left a negative comment. Your Model is a rip off of someone else’s, I don’t know. How would you manage that in that moment? That Brooke, not the Brooke you are today.
Brooke: How did I manage that or how - yeah, I mean, I think I would crawl under the covers and feel bad about myself. Really feel like ashamed. I had so much shame. I had an actual example of - I was trying to sell out one of my programs and so I started sending more emails to my list because that’s what had been recommended to me. And somebody replied and said, “This hard sales,” what did she say?
Amy: I’ve so been there.
Brooke: You’re taking a hard sales approach by banging this down my throat or whatever. And I am not kidding you, I had so much shame about that. Now it’s hysterical to think about. But she’s like, “Why are these hard sales tactics? Why are you emailing me so much? This isn’t who I thought you were.” And I was like, “Oh my gosh, I really am doing something really wrong and really bad.”
And I think that the work that I did on that one circumstance, the shame that I felt and the choice that I made, am I willing to get this email again and again and again and again? Because if the answer is no, if I’m not willing to, I’m going to have to give up because this is going to keep happening. Because in order for me to get my message out there, I’m going to have to keep sending emails. And so there was a shift for me, and in my mind, the thought that I think is, “I will allow people to be wrong about me.”
Amy: Ooh, I will allow people to be wrong about me. That one lesson in life can change everything.
Brooke: Yes. And listen, sometimes you’ll get an email like that and they’ll be right.
Amy: I agree.
Brooke: And you’re like, I probably shouldn’t have sent 25 emails in one day. But in this case, she wasn’t right in my opinion. I had just sent three emails. So she wasn’t used to it from me, it was a different change, but sometimes they’ll be right and you don't have to have the thought, “I’ll allow them to be wrong.” I’ll allow myself to be wrong sometimes and grow from that. And so if you’re willing to be wrong and you’re willing to let other people be wrong sometimes, you will evolve and grow to a place where you’ll be able to create at your highest capacity. But that fear is real.
Amy: Oh, very real. It’s very present. And I love what you said. You had to make a shift. You had to work on it. And I want everyone to note that you did not say, “Oh, I saw it and I was like screw that, moving on.” You did feel a certain way. That is very human. We feel it and we choose a different thought and we move on, and that’s what needs to happen.
Brooke: Well, and I still feel that way today. I know you do too. It’s not as intense, but there are times when - we’re human beings. If someone says something negative about us, it doesn’t feel good.
Amy: No, absolutely not. And I’m way more sensitive than you, so I still am working on it on a deep level.
Brooke: Yeah, and just think, there’s just a lot more people to say it.
Amy: Exactly. But at the end of the day, I do exactly what you said. I am not here for me. I am here for my students. There is a woman in a cubicle right now where she’s looking around thinking, “There has got to me something more for me. This cannot be it.” She’s in a situation that she is not happy, she’s showing up every day, and she is miserable.
I am on a mission to find her and to help her because she doesn’t even know this world exists. That’s why I do videos when I don’t feel good. That’s why I continue to show up when I’m not sure if I’m even qualified sometimes. My mind can really take over. I’m showing up.
Brooke: Yeah. Okay, so let’s talk just a little bit about you as a woman writing a book because I highly advised against such things. And I think it’s really important for - there are a lot of people listening that are authors but writing a book is truly one of the hardest things I have ever done.
Amy: Thank you.
Brooke: And I think for me, it’s very important to support women authors and to buy their books. So go buy Amy’s book for sure. But not just to support her. That’s one amazing reason to do it, but also because the material in this book is truly a labor of love. And one of the things I always say is it’s easy to write a long book where you don’t edit it down.
But when you go through and write a book like you did, which you basically took all of your knowledge that you have learned over all of these years, and given it to us in a way that we can consume and apply so quickly, that is not easy. Tell us a little bit about that process.
Amy: It was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done. I don’t even know if I’ll do it again. That’s how difficult it was. I’m so glad it’s out there in the world now. I’m so proud. But here’s the thing; yes, the writing process was difficult and one of the best things I ever did, this is a little strategy for anyone. I hired my own editor.
So I didn’t wait for my publisher to give me one. As I was writing the book, she was pitching and catching with me and I absolutely needed that because I got so in my head. After the first few chapters, I looked at my husband like, what did I do? I do not know if I can do this.
So I had a regimen every single morning. I got the editor to help me, I got the resources and support I needed, and I also wrote a really shitty first draft. I had to let myself just get it all out there because I wanted it to be perfect and I knew that is never going to happen.
But let me tell you Brooke, the writing of the book was difficult and I thought, “This is something I didn't know was going to be this difficult.” Promoting it has been a little bit of a mindset messiness for me. And what I mean by that is I didn’t know you had to ask for so many favors. I didn’t know like, hey, can I come on your podcast? Or can we do this interview? Or can you mail for my book?
I’m used to running a business and I think life coaches can understand this. It’s just me. I’m just doing my thing. I love that. I love that I can make money on my own and don’t have to ask everyone to help me do it. I love that about entrepreneurship.
Brooke: Yeah, me too.
Amy: But when you’re writing a book, you got to get it out into the world. You need new audiences. I wrote this book to go beyond me and my own community. And so asking for favors is one thing, and when some friends say no, that’s not going to work for me, what I’ve realized is I have to be very careful of my expectations of people.
Just because I did something for them doesn’t mean they’re going to do something for me. So this has been a beautiful growth experience and by beautiful I mean hard and messy. But I say that because anyone who’s starting something new, I’m 14 years in and this has been a challenge for me. And that’s always going to be the case and you have to ask yourself, where am I going to grow here? How am I going to learn?
There’s no growth in comfortable. I had to get uncomfortable to go to my next level. I will absolutely say I’m at a next level of entrepreneurship that I wasn’t before the book. So that is a blessing.
Brooke: Yeah, for sure. Okay, so there’s two things you want to do. You want to be on the Today Show, and you want to be a New York Times bestselling author. Now, let’s talk about the New York Times bestselling author because I think a lot of people want that and should want that for their book.
Amy: I don’t even want to talk about this topic because it makes me so nervous.
Brooke: Oh, it does? Oh, that’s funny.
Amy: Leave it to Brooke to bring it up so I love this. Let’s go there.
Brooke: What is it about being a New York Times bestselling author? Does that mean your book just gets so much more exposure? Or is it just a little feather in your cap? What is that about?
Amy: Okay, so I believe that it opens up doors. I have so many author friends that once they got that accolade, they got more speaking opportunities, people started to notice them more. But here’s something else I know; many studies have been done. People do not buy books because the person is a New York Times bestselling author. Most people do not care nor do they look at it.
So I think in my industry with my peers, I think it could mean something. With my readers, I don’t think they care based on so much research I’ve done on this. And also, what I’ve been told with the New York Times is it’s a crapshoot. You’re not really sure how they’re choosing it. I know friends who have sold hundreds of thousands of books and didn’t make it. I know a friend who sold 7000 books and made it.
Brooke: What?
Amy: Yes. So it’s very, very confusing how they even choose. So my friend Jamie Kern Lima gave me the advice two weeks ago and she said, “Show up and earn it whether you get it or not, earn it in terms of do the work, get the numbers, sell the books, change lives. Whether they give it to you or not, you know you did your very best.” And that is literally how I’m operating.
Brooke: It’s so good. So Amy has to sell, she would like to, the numbers that she wants to hit is like, 10,000 books. I want to help her.
Amy: Well, I want to sell 20,000.
Brooke: Oh sorry, 20,000. Okay.
Amy: 10,000 before the book comes out and another 10,000 the week it does.
Brooke: Okay. So when this airs, the book is out right now. So here’s the crazy thing that I want to ask you all do it. Don’t wait a couple weeks to buy it because it’s crazy how the numbers are. If you buy it now, then all the numbers go up to a certain point and then she can hit the New York Times.
So if you want to support an amazing woman entrepreneur and you want an amazing book, now, some of you are already entrepreneurs so you should buy this book and give it to your best friends. In fact, you should buy 10 of these books and give them to all 10 of your best friends. And another thing I want to tell you is the title of this book is phenomenal.
Amy: Thank you. It did hit at the right time.
Brooke: It is such a good title. Okay, and then once you go buy Amy’s book, you can go to - she has a very special website called Two Weeks - wait, what is it?
Amy: TwoWeeksNoticeBook.com.
Brooke: TwoWeeksNoticeBook.com. And if you go there, you can get her bonus. So tell us a little bit about the bonus because it sounds amazing.
Amy: So if you buy the book right away when you’re hearing this, I have a special virtual event on the 25th of February and I have guests Jenna Kutcher and Jasmine Star and we’re all going to be on stage. It’s virtual but we’re all going to be together on stage and we’re going to help you map out your plan, whether it be to quit your job, to actually get that business started, if you’re stuck, we’re going to do live Q&A’s.
We’re going to talk about business building, mindset building as an entrepreneur, get you a plan so that you leave knowing exactly what you want to do, and we’re also going to talk about if you’re scared to show up online, if you’re scared to do live video. Jasmine is going to drill right into you. And Jen is going to talk about getting out of the hustle mentality, actually creating the lifestyle you want before creating the business that you want so that the two can align.
Brooke: Okay, so just briefly tell us about who those two women are because I don’t want - they need to know what big deals they are.
Amy: Yeah. Jenna Kutcher has the Gold Digger Podcast. Number one podcast on Apple Podcasts. And she talks a lot about finding balance between your personal life and your business life and really creating a business and a life you absolutely love. So she gets into all of that, plus she’s very strategic in how she runs her business.
Brooke: And amazing and fun.
Amy: She is. She’s so fun. Yeah, that’s right, we both know her well. And then Jasmine Star is a professional in all things social media and how to show up and how to be authentic and she is the no BS, cut through it, tell you how to build your business in the most real way. Both of them are so different but they have huge businesses, multi-million-dollar businesses teaching other women and men how to do the same.
Brooke: So good. So you guys, listen, the only way to get this workshop, which is a four-hour workshop, this would be thousands of dollars if you had to pay for it, is to buy the book and then go to the website. And the website is in the book too, right?
Amy: Yes. Actually, I don’t know, but TwoWeeksNoticeBook.com.
Brooke: Okay, TwoWeeksNoticeBook.com.
Amy: You brought up a great point though. There is, throughout the book, a link, a URL to an entire resource section. Templates, scripts, checklist, how-to guides that you can only get if you get the book and then you go to my website and I’ll teach you how to do all the things beyond the book. There’s so much value in the book, but yeah, if you buy the book when we’re talking about it, you get to come to the event. If by chance you’re listening to this after that date, I will still have bonuses for you. So go buy the book and then go to TwoWeeksNoticeBook.com.
Brooke: Amazing. Alright, well, Amy, you are going to be a New York Times bestseller. Oh, and the other thing she wants to be is on the Today Show. So you all tune in to the Today Show to see Amy Porterfield. She’s going to be on there live talking about her book. Let’s put it out into the universe.
Amy: My cheeks are very red right now. It was a secret dream that Brooke likes to tell everyone but this is why she’s my wild older sister. She’s not that much older for the record, but she’s my big sister who puts it out there and I freaking love you for it.
Brooke: Well, I mean, there are things that I tell Amy that she can’t tell the world but…
Amy: True, true. And I got some juicy stuff, my friends.
Brooke: It’s so good. You have to put - I think we have to put our dreams out into the world.
Amy: You’re right.
Brooke: Every single person who listens to my podcast is now going to be putting that into the universe and creating it for you.
Amy: I appreciate it, my friends. Remember when you taught 100 ways to fail?
Brooke: Yes.
Amy: On my list is the Today Show. So even if I fail, it was on my list.
Brooke: Amazing, I love it. Alright my friend, thank you so much for coming on the podcast and giving us your time and teaching us all the things and for putting your work into the world, for making millions of dollars, inspiring me, and for all the bonuses that you’re going to give to all my students. Amazing.
Amy: Oh my gosh, Brooke, thank you for everything. You literally are an inspiration to me every single day and I’m so appreciative to be here, so thanks again.
Brooke: That’s awesome. Love you friend.
Amy: Love you.
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