You are listening to The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo episode number 364.
Welcome to The Life Coach School Podcast, where it's all about real clients, real problems, and real coaching. And now your host, master coach, instructor Brooke Castillo.
Oh my gosh, I have a panel of Latinas who are freaking out, who are nervous, who are excited. They've had no warning of what the topic is going to be, we're just going to dive in.
Today, I'm so excited today, to introduce you to some bad ass women who are going to talk to you about their experience with coaching, overcoming obstacles and their life in a way that's going to inspire you and excite you to do the same.
So welcome, everyone to the podcast. Don't be nervous. Everyone take a big deep breath. And here's how I want to do it, let's start, I'll call on each of you individually and just give us a little bit of background of who you are and how you came to coaching.
And then we'll go back and talk about maybe each of you could pick the biggest obstacles maybe you feel like you've overcome in your life that would be useful for our audience. And maybe some tips and ideas on how you personally used your wisdom and knowledge and bad assery to overcome. So let's start with you, Maggie.
Maggie: Oh my goodness. Hi.
Brooke: Hi.
Maggie: My name is Maggie Reyes.
Brooke: And I'm amazing.
Maggie: Yeah, and I'm amazing. I'm a very proud graduate of the Life Coach School, class of 2012.
Brooke: What? Stop it. That's so awesome.
Maggie: Very good point. So I am a marriage life coach. I help type A women have better marriages. Type A women like me have a certain list of challenges that we all have in common. And I am the world's foremost expert on all of them.
Brooke: I love it. Amazing. And tell us how you came to life coaching and how you started doing that.
Maggie: Okay, so my very first coach is a woman that you and I both love named Christine Caine. Christine Caine had Brooke Castillo as a guest speaker many years ago.
Brooke: Yeah.
Maggie: And the first time I ever saw Brooke or heard of Brooke, she was live in these fabulous boots that are legendary that I still remember, and taught the model. And everybody in that room, you could hear a pin drop when Brooke was teaching the model. And here's the fun part of that story, I was mesmerized. I was excited. I thought this was amazing. I bought your book. And then it took me to three years later was when I signed up for coach training.
Brooke: I love it. And now you’re a full-time coach and you're coaching women, type A women on their marriages?
Maggie: Correct.
Brooke: Love it. Okay, let's go to you, Brenda.
Brenda: Hi everyone. Hi Brooke. Oh my gosh, I can't even tell you how excited I am. So a little bit about me, I am a first generation Mexican American. Like this is something I really want to bring at the forefront because it's something that I hadn't done before. And I think, for me, that's an important part of why I'm here today. So that's just one aspect of me. But an important part that I love of me, that I love very much.
I am a mom, I have now a toddler. I've been running my own life coaching practice for four years now. And what brought me to life coaching, I had struggled with my weight and with food. My relationship with my body with food felt like the most painfully emotional thing in my life for a couple decades. And by the way, because I was trying to figure that out, I had already gone and been formally trained in holistic nutrition. And I was trying to figure out like, what is going on here? Why can't I figure this out? Like, I'm a smart woman. I'm hard working. I'm driven.
You know, speaking of the first-generation Mexican American element that I was talking about, I had been the first one in my family to go to college and then to go to graduate school. So it's like, “Okay, I'm smart. I'm hard working. Why is this? Like, I don't understand what's going on.” And I felt really baffled and frustrated. Like, why is food and weight a constant battle for me?
And I heard your podcast, I think it was one of the first ones that I heard. And I think I was like three episodes in and I was like, “This is the thing that's missing. I need to understand my brain and my emotions.” So I immediately, well not immediately, but a few episodes into listening to your podcast I decided that I needed to go learn whatever else I needed to go learn. And I figured out how to pay for life coach training and that's how I ended up finding you.
Brooke: So and you're also masters certified.
Brenda: Oh, yes, yes.
Brooke: Which that's kind of a fun story too.
Brenda: Oh my gosh, I have so many stories.
Brooke: That's kind of a fun story because she originally didn't get accepted into the master coach training because the application process, it's pretty rigorous to get in there. And we were only taking 10 people at the time. And she didn't get accepted, along with many other people that didn't get accepted. But Brenda was the only one that came back and said, “It's unacceptable that I wasn't accepted.” And what did you say? I'll pay you double, or I'll pay... Remind me what exactly it was?
Brenda: It wasn’t double but it was a few thousand dollars more than what it was costing. Which, by the way, I didn't even have the money of what it cost to begin with.
Brooke: Yes, that’s right. Yeah.
Brenda: And actually, I mean, I'll just go ahead and say this now because I think it's a perfect place to say it. One of the messages that I wanted to make sure to say today to anyone listening, is that for me part of what's brought me here to this point, I mean, Brooke, this is so exciting. In the past 12 months in my business I've made half a million.
Brooke: What?
Brenda: I mean, it was like 4,000 –
Brooke: It makes that investment, which was so big at the time, right, seem small now because of your success. I love that.
Brenda: Yeah. But like, so much of that for me was constantly taking action from a place of belief. And like any obstacle just like, “Okay, what's the next thing? What's the next thing that would be me taking action from belief?” Even though the doubt is always there, by the way, always.
Brooke: Yeah. And you know, I remember you coming back and saying, “No, I want to be in master coach training and I'm willing to, like, put more money on the line. I believe in myself, I'm willing to do this.” And I was like, “Oh, hell yeah. Let's go.”
Brenda: I told you I would be your best student.
Brooke: And you were, right? That's so amazing to me. And that's the kind of, I think self advocacy, that when you believe in yourself, you go after stuff. That's the stuff I love in students. And you really were such an amazing student, and you came so far. Your coaching, when we first started wasn't quite there. And by the end of it it was just like amazing, so extraordinary. That was an intense group that we had go through master coach training.
And then it was so fun at the end to be able to give you that extra money that you had paid, give it back. And everyone was crying. And it was amazing.
Brenda: Yeah.
Brooke: It was amazing. And now look at your success, it’s just so extraordinary. So talk a little bit about your business.
Brenda: Oh, yes. So what brought me to life coaching, which was my own struggle with food and with weight. With my relationship to my body, really, is what it was and my relationship to food. That's what I do now. And I love my work. I love the method that I've created, the curriculum that I've created is so empowering, in depth, I think the best of course. And what I help my clients do is transform this area of their life. Really put an end to their struggling with this area of their life. And to do it on a way that's very much on their own terms.
I think that that had to be an important piece for me. You know, even learning from you, Brooke, and like how you taught that. Of course, I learned the model from your how to create awareness on my thoughts, my emotions. But even in the way that you would talk about food, because of course that was your thoughts that served you about it.
Brooke: Yeah, of course. Yeah.
Brenda: And I understood that, but there's always this piece of like, “Oh, but it's different for me.” And I think part of that was the, you know, as being Mexican and being in that Mexican culture, Latino culture. Like in different cultures food can have this different place, I guess, or space, right? It could.
And so for me, I didn't want that to be neutral. I didn't want that to, you know? And so I would say I feel my relationship with food is really fun, and easy now. But also like fun. And there is like, I have a picture on my website of me, with a michelada, you know, a drink. It's like clamato and a Mexican beer. Well, I put a lot of lime in there. But anyways, for me, it was really important –
Brooke: I love that you’re the last 10 pounds weight loss coach talking about all this. It's so good.
Brenda: Yeah, but like it had to be that because for me, and this has been like a thread throughout my whole life. Like hearing it out in a way that worked for me, that felt powerful for me. It was never going to be like, let me go and copy paste what Brooke, you know, or anyone else I'm just using you as an example.
Brooke: Yeah.
Brenda: And for me, it was like, “Okay, I want to find a place where I am taking care of my body. Obviously, I have the formal training in nutrition.” So like, I could tell you why a michelada is not the nutrition, you know, drink water is of course the nutritional approach, right? But I'm just like, was so committed to find a space for all of it. A space for all the things that I wanted to make space for.
Brooke: Yeah, I love that so much. It's such a good reminder. And especially because we all have such different backgrounds, such different cultures, such different values as they apply to our families and how we want to live our lives. And so I teach based on, most of us teach based on what worked for us. And how, you know, everything that I teach is usually something that I worked on on myself and then applied.
But the message to like all coaches that ever go through our training is take what you learn from me, mix it with you and you'll never have competition, right? Because no one can be better at being you. You try to be me, I'm always going to win.
Brenda: Yeah, that's right.
Brooke: I'm always going to be better at being me. But when you take you and mix it with some of the knowledge that I've created it's a beautiful example of the work that you're doing in the world. Even though you're using the model, you're using the application of your nutrition background, your culture, your ideas, what worked for you in a very different way to help your clients lose weight. And at the end everyone's going to give their website so you can go check them out some more. Okay, let's go to you, Esperanza.
Esperanza: Hello, Brooke.
Brooke: Hi.
Esperanza: I'm Esperanza Lebron, and I'm the life coach for the Latinx community. So one of the ways that I got to coaching is what I teach and coach on, which is the art of possibility. And yeah, so what brought me to coaching is at 15, and 17, I was a teen mom, high school dropout. And all around me, I heard everyone just tell me who I was, statistic, not going anywhere. My voice is starting to crack because it's just such an emotional story.
I was always looking for someone to tell me who I could become. I just didn't find her. So I was like, “Okay.” I had just turned 21 and I looked around at my life, and I was thinking like, “There's got to be so much more. And so I’m going to find her. I'm going to become her.”
And so that's what I did. 21 went back to school, got a high school diploma. At the time, I remember writing this list of goals. And I didn't know anything about impossible goals yet, but that's exactly what they were. Number one was get a high school diploma. And then number two, I had an uncle that was in the Navy and no one else in all the of generations of my family ever served in the military. So I was like I would love to put honor behind my name for my son's. So I wrote that crazy impossible goal down, join the army. Five years later, I had a bachelor's degree, enlisted as a soldier, commissioned in the top 10% of my class in ROTC as an army officer. Got a master's degree.
Brooke: Oh my goodness.
Esperanza: It was the art of possibility. And it was me because I believed in something so much bigger than myself. And even though I was living in this 700, square foot garage. It wasn't even an apartment, it was like a garage apartment with my two sons. I remember telling them, “It's not always going to be like this.” And I just held on to that belief. And there's something beautiful that amplifies your greatness when you really believe.
Brooke: So what do you think that was? Because there's many women in that same situation that do not grab on to that belief and pursue and have the success that you had. So what could you share? If there's someone young, maybe in that situation now that's hearing this, what do you think the difference was?
Esperanza: I think the difference was there was so much doubt around me, like accepting that no, no cabe duda, like accepting that there's no room for doubt. And I just kept saying, “Even though I'm scared, even though no one I know has done anything like this before. First in my family to get a master's degree, become an officer, buy a house. Like even though no one is doing it, why can't I be the first? Why shouldn't I be the first? Why can't I say who I can become?”
Brooke: Yes.
Esperanza: And that 21-year-old me writing down that list of impossible goals back then, I literally wrote it on the back of an envelope. And then I sat and I cried. And I think that those tears were like releasing the belief in me. And so I just started very small. It's like, “High school diploma, here I come.”
Brooke: Yeah. And I mean, that's no joke having, did you have one or two children at that time?
Esperanza: Two, so I had one at 15 and one at 17.
Brooke: Okay. Yeah, I mean, for me to hear stories like this, I think about like when I was 15, how much I was suffering in my own mind and searching in my own mind. And had, like you said, so much self-doubt. To be able to set your mind on something and go after it, it's so extraordinary. So tell us a little bit about your business now.
Esperanza: Yes, so I left the army in 2018, I had just made the captain list. And I knew that I was at this pivotal moment in my career where I could stay and retire, or I could come into the corporate world. And so I made that decision because while I was working on my bachelor's degree, I saw this life coaching, become an executive and professional coach, and I was thinking like, something was just gravitating towards it. And back then in 2012, I knew that that was something that I wanted to pursue, but I didn't know anything about it yet. So the safe option for me was go to the army.
It just kept coming back. I think like the universal will remind you when, you know, that it's time to do something for you. And it just kept coming back to me. So I got certified before I left, and I knew I wanted to be an executive coach. So I got a great offer, six figure offer, coming out from the army.
Brooke: Wow.
Esperanza: That was another impossible goal on my list. I just knew that there was something more, specifically within my culture. Like I knew that I was being called to do the work for mi gente, for my people. And so I talked to my sister and I said, “I really think that we should start something together.” And we actually launched Latina Money Moms. And Latina Money Moms is now in the process of becoming a nonprofit organization in San Antonio.
We were teaching money mindset, personal finance because the statistics don't lie. Latinos are underrepresented in so many categories, with no exception to personal finance, building wealth, building businesses. And I just knew like there was something in here that needed to come out.
And at that same time, I was like, “Okay, let's do this and make it accessible for everyone.” Accessible for everyone, and we were really looking back on that 15, 21-year-old that I was, that my sister was and where we were. And that was just this beautiful passion project and we were able to reach so many women and help with that.
And then so for my business, I was doing my corporate thing, and I was thinking, I found you Brooke, and I was like, “Okay, I love the brain part so I [inaudible] with Brooke, I'm going to get certified even though I've already paid $10,000 to get certified a few years ago. So I went to Life Coach School, oh man, possibility broke open.
And then I was like, “I could totally do this on my own.” So that's where Lebron coaching was born. We work one on one, and then one beautiful part of the way that I do my work with my people, is we talk about the possibilities.
So some people are attracted to me from my backstory. Some people are attracted to me they want to start a business. Some people are attracted to me because I've shared about my husband dying in the midst of the whole thing with getting my undergrad degree, joining the army, and all of that. We suffered a great loss, my sons and I, my husband died in a motorcycle accident.
So people, they're just talking. And one of the things that, I mean, I have PTSD and depression. And when I realized that I could have that, and I could have the choice to unravel. And I had the choice to make a protocol of what I was going to do when that hit me. I knew that that was something I wanted to teach.
Brooke: Yes.
Esperanza: And so in my practice I bring in RTT, which is rapid transformation therapy. And I do this specifically because growing up my dad didn't believe, and this is pretty widespread in our culture. My dad and my family didn't believe in mental health. Like the depression he was like, “I don't get it, just get over it.”
So when I found rapid transformation therapy and what it did for me, and the work that you do at the subconscious level paired with the work that you do at the conscious level in coaching was [inaudible]. And I just thought like this is exactly what I want to do for my people one on one. This is exactly the kind of work that I want to bring in.
Brooke: So in your coaching practice you're doing one on one, do work solely with women?
Esperanza: No, women and men.
Brooke: You do with both. Okay, amazing. Awesome. Okay let's go to you, Monica.
Monica: Hi Brooke.
Brooke: Hi:
Monica: I'm so excited to be here. So well I'm Monica Sosa. I am a weight loss and life coach. I am from Mexico and I have 11 years out of my country, this is part of my story. We moved, my husband, me, and four of our kids, we moved first. We took an expat opportunity for him. First it started in Amsterdam and then we moved here in the US.
And from here now I'm helping Spanish speaking women to lose their weight. Yeah, to reach their ideal weight for good. And I will say that’s changing their life and transforming their lives. So, well now I'm doing this I have my podcast called Puerdes Hacerlo, which means you can do it. And well honestly, Brooke, I'm super excited and super happy to be here with you.
Brooke: Yeah.
Monica: Because I really want to tell you thank you for your decision of being an example of what is possible, because your decision has changed my life. And now that I'm sharing my message in Spanish, it’s completely in Spanish, I know that you know that, but it's transforming a lot of Spanish speaking women’s life also. I'm sharing my message; I'm talking about your model. I'm having so much fun creating even some new words in Spanish, because –
Brooke: Oh, like what? Tell me.
Monica: Well for example, it's called piensa descarga. You it's a new word in Spanish. It's like I make these compound words. It said the translation of down, how do you call it? Thought download.
Brooke: Oh, thought download, okay.
Monica: Yeah, of course. It’s so fun, I mean, I have so much fun doing this. And it's like it's super good because then for my clients it's like they are having all these, my program is full of new words. I love it.
Brooke: I love it.
Monica: Well, so for me, doing all this, Brooke, is just proving that dreams come true. Because for me my whole life, well, many years ago, I just know that I feel this passion and also like ability and desire to help other women to shine or to write through lifestyle and through self-esteem. And I always dreamed, when I was living in Mexico, I remember I dreamed. My dream was to have a big center. I even saw the place, big center for woman growth. When we moved, when we started this expat life for me it was like, “This is not going to happen.” Because I wanted to do it in Spanish. So my whole time being out of Mexico I just keep myself learning and well coaching as my jobby, doing that.
Brooke: Yeah, if you don't know what a jobby is, it's when you pretend to have a job, but really, it's a hobby.
Monica: Exactly. I mean, it was like funny because well, it's something that I really love, and I would like to make money off of. But also, it was like these thoughts in my mind like, “This is something that I really enjoy, it’s so helpful for me. I don't really need the money. Like, why should I charge?” You know, all these mindsets.
Well, it was until I met Brenda and I lost my last 10 pounds. When I moved from Amsterdam to New York, there's a thought out there. Some of the ladies we think, well my friends there, and I thought moving to the US is equal to gaining weight. You're going to gain weight. And also, I thought that it was because I was not in my country, I started gaining weight. And also because of my age, I turned 40. So I was like, “Okay.” So I was stuck.
Brooke: So that's a thing? Like, when you're moving to America you know you're going to gain weight, because of our food being so terrible, is that what it is?
Monica: Yeah, that's an idea. But that's an idea.
Brooke: It’s a thought, right? Right
Monica: Totally, because I was like, also the feeling is like you feel victim, there’s nothing that I can do. I’m in this country and I’m going to be overweight. So I was really frustrated. And I was coaching my clients but they were having this thought. I was like, “Yes, it's true. I mean, we are going to have this.”
Brooke: You were agreeing with them, that's fantastic.
Monica: Exactly. And that was until I got introduced into your model, which was thanks to Brenda.
Brooke: Brenda wasn’t having it.
Monica: Yeah.
Brooke: That’s awesome.
Monica: So I remember feeling like that. And well, also kids going to college, so missing my family. Because at the beginning of the expat life is super excited. Everything is so excited. And then the moment when you're like, “Where do I belong?” So in that moment, I found Brenda, the last 10 pounds. I remember that first call. After my first call I start losing weight.
Brooke: Wow.
Monica: Yeah, because she made me realize that I was emotional eating. And then I was like, “Well, I'm not sure Brenda, because you know what? I am a health coach. And I am like, super clean, organic, quit sugar. You name it. Like everything. It’s like there’s no way We're saying, there's something wrong with me. It may be that because I'm here in this country.” And she was like, I remember her, she was like, “Oh yes, you are over eating healthy foods.” I was like, “Okay.” And that was it.
Brooke: That's a thing people, you can overeat healthy food. You can over eat hummus.
Monica: Exactly. So, well, I signed up with Brenda. And then when she introduced me with your model, Brooke, for me it was like I got it. Like everything just made sense. I had like, having a key in my hand to open every single door that I wanted to open. Or that I even think that it could be open for me.
So we start this coaching. Oh my god, it was like I was texting Brenda every day a model in Spanish. It wasn’t Spanglish totally because she was answering me in English, it was amazing. So I just felt unstoppable when I reached my goal. And then I was like, “I'm ready.” I started my podcast, and then I continue the coaching. Well one of my friends who was like me, both of us were in this country - so hard at our age, oh my god. So I start, she was like, I call her my guinea pig. I was like, “You know, the whole thing is just you need to believe in yourself.”
And I remember she telling me like, “I don't know how to do it. I don't believe in me, but I do believe in you.” So I was like, “You know what, believe in me and I will help you. In order that you will be in love, you're not just going to believe in yourself. You're going to trust yourself more than any other person.” So we did that process, she lost 50 pounds.
Brooke: 50?
Monica: 50 pounds.
Brooke: Wow.
Monica: And she transformed her life. Now she's in Scholars, she’s like a Triple Diamond mom.
Brooke: Yes.
Monica: Yeah, of course. So we were like on fire. And for me, it was like the center that I want to create, it's going to be online. It's going to be more than what I was expecting.
Brooke: Oh my gosh, I love this.
Monica: And so after that, best decision ever, I signed up with you to the certification. Totally, a totally transformational experience for me. I love it. I mean, best investment, best decision. I remember my process was, well Beth was my instructor. So it was challenging, scary, fun, exciting, everything. But for me it was like the cherry on the top for my brain.
Brooke: I love it. I love it. And so you coach only in Spanish?
Monica: Yes. Yes.
Brooke: And your podcast is in Spanish too?
Monica: Exactly.
Brooke: Okay, amazing. All right. We are definitely going to get everyone's URL. Okay, Judith, talk to me.
Judith: What up Brooke? Just kidding.
Brooke: I have heard regularly, I know I tell you this, but it seems like a lot more than regular people I hear how much people love you. “I love Judith. I love Judith, I love Judith.” What is that about? What are you doing out there in the world that people need to come tell me how much they love you? I love it by the way.
Judith: Well, and it's so funny because I think the thought that I have when I'm coaching, or guest teaching, or guest speaking is always just like how much I fiercely love whoever I’m talking to.
Brooke: So that’s why they're all loving on you.
Judith: I think so, it’s just reflected back at me. Like my prayer always is like, “Lord, just let me love them up. Let me love them up.” It's not about me, I'm here to love them up.
Brooke: Oh my gosh, so good.
Judith: It's infectious. It's delicious.
Brooke: Yes. Tell us all about you.
Judith: Well, so just everyone's story was so amazing. And I have like similar pieces to each story. I'm from a Puerto Rican background. We're very matriarchal. So the women in my family ruled the roost. And it's so interesting because they're so entrepreneurial, so many women in my family. But something always seemed to go awry, and never quite work out. Like for my grandma, for my mom, like there would always be something that went awry. And I mean now that I'm a coach, I can look back, I'm like, “Oh, that's the model you were running. That's where the shit fell apart.”
But it's so interesting to see that. I mean, even in my own immediate family we had periods of homelessness. We lived in a converted garage. We were evicted. We lived in a motel for a while. I mean, like, we had crazy things go on. But it's so interesting that even through all of that there was this thread of like me having big giant dreams. And my mom being like, “Okay, Mija, I don't know how that’s going to work, we'll figure it out.” That's like sort of the mantra in my family, we’ll figure it out. Now, that's not the best plan in the world because it's actually lack of plan, but it sounds really nice.
So like even when we were homeless, we had what we’d call homeless buckets. And I had a pair of jeans, one pair of jeans. And for someone who's really in love with fashion even when she was a little kid, this was like a big deal. So I would take my pair of jeans, I would cuff them up, cuff them down. I would wear them with a belt, I would like change like the length of the cuff to pretend that I had like four or five pairs of jeans when I only had one.
So there was like always this thing and my mom fostered it. But I think because her own models had like this running up against like limitations there's like, I want to say poverty mentality, but this idea that something always goes wrong, and then that can play out. So, for me she was just like, “I don't know how you're going to... You're just brilliant. I don't know who you came from. We all love you, just do your thing.”
And somewhere along the way like that got sort of dimmed. And I started to make safer choices. So instead of fully pursuing fashion design, I was like, “I'm going to be a lawyer, because that's easier.” Which makes no sense.
Brooke: Right.
Judith: But let's just pretend that that makes sense. And then, I mean, I remember having this really difficult trial. It was like six months long. I was a baby attorney. I mean, I was a little baby attorney doing crazy shit. And I was on my way to court. And I was just like in this fog and I was like, “I'm going to look on Pinterest for a Life Coach School podcast.” And there came this blonde lady, and she was like smiling at me and was like, “Press me. The answer is here.”
And I remember listening to you and you were breaking down, like your thoughts create your feelings. And I was like, “Wait, shut the fuck up. What? No, that's not a thing.” And I went and like polled the other attorneys. I'm like, “Have you heard this shit? Like, this sounds crazy, right? Like, riddle me this, logic me out of this.” And they're like, “No, that actually makes sense.” I'm like, “Okay, there's something to this.”
And then I did Stop Overeating masterclass with you. And I remember the consult call we had for that. I was like all in my story, and then you're like, “What are those yellow dresses behind you?” Because I had all of these dresses I had made on a rack behind me. And I was like, “Oh, okay, let's talk fashion.” I remember that, it was so cool.
And like, basically this windy road. And I think one thing you've taught me, there's a million things you've taught me. But one thing that has always stuck out to me, in one of the coaching sessions where you were like, “Every time you stop trying to be yourself, like it's never going to work because you're always just going to sneak out.”
Brooke: Yeah.
Judith: You can't contain whatever that is like, it's just going to keep sneaking out. So stop, just let yourself be yourself.
Brooke: Mm-hmm.
Judith: And that has like, I found like this whole journey has got me back to the little kid who used to dream big and not really worry about what other people are thinking so much.
And like, I got to bring back like my love of vintage and my love of style, while also my love of women and helping women, and lifting them up. And then bring in like my Puerto Rican roots and the crazy shit my mamma and grandma used to say. Like it's so beautiful that I got to take all these loves. And of course, obviously, my legal training and acumen has helped tremendously as a business owner. But the beautiful thing is like I got to create a niche of mine; I just get to make shit up.
Brooke: So tell me, do you feel like you've faced obstacles that maybe I haven't, or other white women haven't experienced in this industry? Tell us a little bit about that.
Judith: Well, I think what’s so fascinating, I think we'll just illustrate the example of this. And this was not a confidential conversation so I'll just talk about it. When we were at the writing retreat.
Brooke: Yeah.
Judith: And you and Katrina, were talking about how much money it would be to fly private.
Brooke: Yes.
Judith: And you were like, “Oh, it's about 10 million.” And you guys are throwing these like seven figure numbers around like it was nothing. And I remember watching you both and being like, “What the fuck?” And I remember saying to you like, “Oh, some crazy shit I heard some white lady say today.” And you both laughed but then you paused and you were like, “Hey, watch such shit. Watch that white lady shit.” And I think the obstacles that a lot of my fellow Latina coaches is, is numbers that large are not normalized to us.
Brooke: Yeah, and just to be clear I wasn't like offended like, “Don't call me a white woman.”
Judith: No, no, no, of course not.
Brooke: It was more like I think this happens a lot, like that's not for me. That amount of money is not for me. That's not, like what you're saying, it's not normalized. Now, let's all be honest, all of us are women on this call. Those numbers aren't normalized for women in general, right? But it's compounded. Right? Tell us a little bit about that.
Judith: Yeah, so like add to that the intersectionality of like we’re women and we’re socialized as women. But then add to that a cultural dynamic of particularly what it means to be a feminine woman in a Latin culture, which is a little different from sort of Anglo Americans. And then add to that there's a religious component that comes with our culture, which, you know, adds again a role of women. The amount women are allowed to make, how women are allowed to show up in the world.
And you add all of that, it's just like a mindfuck on mindfuck on mindfuck. And finding your way out of that means you're not only like defying what it means to be a woman in America, you're defying what it means to be a Latin woman. And then you're defying what it means to be a woman with whatever your cultural, religious upbringing. So it's like these layers that you have to peel back. So you telling me, “Hey, watch it. Like don't say it's not for you. If you think that way, you're going to think it's not for you.”
Brooke: Right.
Judith: Is really coming up against like generations of notions about what it means to be a woman, and to make money, and to do the damn thing without having to concern yourself with taking everyone else with you.
So if you want to get on a jet plane, you take maybe your sons and your doggies. I have to take my aunties and my cousins. Like I'm saying proverbially speaking. Like there's a community concern that happens with us that I don't know if that happens necessarily like the average American Anglo household. So when we make money it means we collectively make money, or we don't make money.
Brooke: Yes, I was actually talking to Aprille about this. A Black woman has similar experience in her culture, feeling like if she's going to make money you have to bring everyone along with her. And she was really struggling with that. And one of the things that she had said, and I’ve repeated it many times because it's actually been helpful for me is like, she was basically saying like, “It's not that I didn't bring them, it's just that they didn't come with me.” Right?
And in her mind, like having to overcome the guilt and the isolation that she felt from that experience, is that similar to what it's like for you too? And to make the kind of money even that you make as an attorney, but to even 10 times that, to be making millions of dollars. What is that like for you? What would that be like for you within your community? That may be different from what my experience might be.
Judith: Yeah, I mean, it's interesting because when you have, like when you come from, like at least where I grew up in the neighborhood that I grew up in, like it's okay to be outwardly flashy if you have a hood hustle. So like, if you're like selling random things and you like rock sneakers that are a little more expensive. Or you have a little more expensive car and you won't tell how you got the car, like that situation like that's perfectly acceptable. However, should you work really hard to earn the money, and you start to show outward signs of success, now you're bougie.
And there’s like a weird, it's a weird stigma. And it's like this fine line that you can't even say that you know where the bright line is. And my particular family is not necessarily, I was not raised that particular. But the neighborhood I grew up in that was very much the circumstances. And then you internalize so much because then there's a fear that you will be alone.
Brooke: Yes.
Judith: There's a concern that maybe your family will see you differently.
Brooke: Yes.
Judith: That you were always kind of weird. And extraordinary also means you're extra ordinary, and that's not necessarily the best thing in the world. So navigating that is difficult. And then comes all the chips on your shoulders from having perhaps been poor, or homeless, or been ridiculed by your peers for not having enough.
Brooke: Yes.
Judith: So it's like you bring a library with you of expectations and other people's hopes and dreams for you. And I think that's sort of the experience of being like a Latina who's a business owner and going to make a shit ton of money, is the library of expectations that you seem to be dragging along with you everywhere.
Brooke: Yes. And I would love for, as we go through, again, for anyone else on this call who want to address that and your personal, unique experiences with that. Because I think we all have, at least I have had like this assumption that all of us women have the same stuff that we're dealing with.
But there's very unique cultural differences and ethnic differences that I've been completely unaware of. That learning from you all and talking about them have been so useful to me. And not just understanding people in general, but also in my coaching, and being able to show up in a way and come up with tools and talk about things in a way that is much more effective.
So let's go back to you, Maggie. Tell me one obstacle that you've dealt with.
Maggie: Yeah, so I was thinking about it in the context of I work in marriage, and I grew up with a single mom. And as I was listening to all of our stories, I had this flash of memory, like everyone listening right now is hearing us after the model, right? Like we are successful business women right now. But I had like one pair of Reeboks that I wore until it had a hole in it. And the only reason I replaced it was because it had a hole in it and there was no other choice. Right?
And so I just want to say that for the people who are listening to us who are, like we’re the after. Like you always talk about the before and after.
Brooke: Yeah.
Maggie: Someone listening to us is the before.
Brooke: Yes.
Maggie: And you too can be here, right? I just want to take a stand for that.
So, I grew up with a single mom, I had no idea what a healthy married relationship looked like. Like my friends kind of had these patriarchal relations, like my friend's parents had these relationships that I was like, “I want no piece of that. None of that.”
And for a long time in my life I've always been sort of this brainy, nerdy person. And I was like, “Will I ever be able to have a marriage that actually works for me?” That isn’t like, in the Latin culture you cook. I mean, if you're a wife that doesn't cook, like who are you, right? My husband is the person who cooks in our family. And stepping out and saying, “This is who I am. This is not something I have any interest in developing. I don't have the skill and I don't want to develop it.” And just being that person when everyone else around you expects you to play a particular role.
Brooke: Ah, yeah.
Maggie: You just have to take a deep breath with that for a minute, right? And so one of my obstacles was what is possible for me? What could I have? Could I have something that actually felt good to me? And so when I teach marriage things, I'm like, “I don't want your marriage to look like mine. I want it to look like what your best marriage looks like. Here are some tools you can use to do that.”
By the way I have to mention this, when you were talking with Brenda about don't be more like me, like take my stuff and make it yours.
Brooke: Yeah.
Maggie: One of my dreams is about to come true because I'm going to say two sentences that I've always wanted to say. Which is, you know, I'm surrounded by weight loss coaches. And I took Super Thinking, which was homework, coaching homework from Stacey Boehman. Which I want to mention, thank you Brooke, for everything you have poured into Stacey, that she has like poured into me. She's my coach, she's my coach for two and a half years and I am so grateful to both of you.
So she gave us super thinking homework. And you know, no flour, no sugar, how effective that is when you're exploring different things about your weight? I asked myself, “What is the no flour and no sugar of marriage?”
Brooke: What? Stop it.
Maggie: Yes, and I call them my emotional weight loss tools. That's what they’re called, they have a name.
Brooke: I love this so much.
Maggie: And it's no complaining, no defending.
Brooke: What genius.
Maggie: Thank you, I receive that. So when you think about removing sugar and flour, right, for everyone who's not familiar, I'm surrounded by weight loss coaches all my life, right? So they talk about this all the time. And I was like, “Well, when you remove flour and sugar you see what your metabolism is really doing right? Then it gives you the opportunity to decide whatever you're going to do about your nutrition.
In marriage, if you remove complaining and you remove defending, whatever is left is what's real to work on.
Brooke: So good. No complaining, no defending, no questions.
Maggie: There you go.
Brooke: Like, is this complaining? If you have to ask, it is.
Maggie: And to make it clear, right, when you take out flour and sugar you add nutritious meals and you do other things, right? So when you remove complaining you add requests. That’s all you do, it’s very simple. And when you remove defending you just add curiosity. Instead of going to defensive, “Tell me more, why do you think that?”
So thank you for letting me share that here with everyone. Because that was one of my dreams.
Brooke: I love it. That's so good, so good. Okay, let's go to you, Brenda.
Brenda: Okay, I wanted to add a little bit to just what Judith was saying about like, it being such a fine line. About how in our Latino culture, at least from my experience, right. It's like, okay, my mom and my dad are both one of 13. Like just to give you an idea of just like what, you know. And this is like so normal, I have one daughter. And I'm like, “You're only going to have one kid?” It's just it’s a different, you know, families are big, they can be big.
But the other thing, and I totally agree, it's a fine line. I also think like for me thinking about my family has been such a huge motivation. And like, in fact it’s one of my compelling why's. So I can totally see how you can have thoughts and then like feel like an anchor or a weight in a, you know, non-useful way. But for me, compelling why, I think my family's like up there, top three for sure. Maybe number one.
You know, when I think about, so both of my parents immigrated to the US. I think about my dad, him like literally walking through the desert. He said he turned, I think it was either 12 or 13. He had either his 12th or 13th birthday in the desert. Like I, you know, I have feelings. I just I'm so proud when I think about my 12-year-old, 13-year-old dad like leaving his family to pursue his dream, to expand his possibilities for his family, et cetera. But I think about that, and I kind of think of it as like we're all running a relay together. You know how relay runners pass the baton?
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: And I'm like, “Okay, so that's my dad’s, what's it called? The leg of the run. Is that the right way you would say it?
Brooke: Yeah.
Brenda: Okay, and then it's like, “What am I going to do with my leg of the run?”
Brooke: I love that.
Brenda: Like seriously, I get so choked up and it's so compelling for me. And when I think about my daughter too like, because then that's that forward looking of the family. Oh my gosh, like what am I going to be an example of for her? What is she, you know, she's going to grow up.
I grew up, like I would go clean houses with my mom. I would go mow lawns with my dad, right? Like we grew up similar stories that you've heard. I remember growing up with three immigrant families, like in a one-bedroom apartment. And for us, it was super fun, because I was with my cousins, like we were playing. But just thinking back now as an adult, I'm like, “Wow, you know, that must have been pretty challenging.” I was having a great time because we were kids, it was fun.
But now, like my daughter is going to see mom's making like millions from home, you know? And just that's such a compelling why for me, is the family.
And even this, like this conversation we're having here today. When I say family, I think that's also community, it's like roots. Judith and I thought about the Latinx coaches and creating the directory, which, you know, we want to share with everyone too. And creating just like a community with the Latinx coaches because that is a compelling thing. And for me, it's like a fire, right? It feels like a fire. Like when I think about the model, and I think about the F and the F line, it's like on fire. Even though technically, I don't know if Bev would approve.
Brooke: If that was an actual feeling that you could put in there, yeah.
Brenda: Yeah, but it feels like it for me. So I wanted to just, you know, kind of building on what Judith was saying totally, but how she said it's a fine line. And I think just creating awareness. Because as I am myself, creating new breakthroughs as far as like no one in my family has ever made the kind of money I'm making right now. Especially not in the way I'm making it. Like my dad, you know, worked really hard as a gardener. We live in Phoenix, Arizona so it's freaking hot. Like that was hard labor, right?
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: I'm like here in my cute office. I mean, and I'm doing very important work of course, I'm not downplaying it. But I'm just saying like the breakthroughs that I'm having now, as far as financial wealth and building wealth, no one's ever done, and so I do have to be attentive.
So I do think this is an important message for Latino coaches listening, or even just any Latino, any women of color listening, that I do have to be aware. And it is a fine line sometimes. Like my thoughts about this, are they serving me or not right now? Because they may have been serving me even a year ago. But like are they serving me right now? And like you really just have to be checking in often.
Brooke: Yeah. And I think like a point that I think you make here is something that I've coached a lot of people on. Is when your family, whom you love, and they've raised you on a culture of maybe hard work, and the value of hard work, and putting the time in, and they've demonstrated that. And when you take that and like 10 times it, like literally. And make 10 times as much money with not as hard of labor it seems like, oh, that should be great. Isn't that wonderful?
But that's something your brain has to contend with. And it's something to work through. And we've done a lot of coaching, just the two of us, me coaching you directly on understanding what is available and what we're worthy of without discrediting all of the people that came before us. And so I think it's really important to send the message that you can have both.
Brenda: Yeah. The other thing if I would add about any obstacles, because I think I've been, I mean, I have been doing this work and I want to share it with everyone since I have the opportunity. I think as Latinos, women of color, as a Latina, and this also is adding on to what Judith was saying as well. There's the piece where growing up in this culture, like you assimilate. And I've been calling this whitewashing for myself. It's not even something like where I'm lying, I'm not being who I am. But it's like not fully, right, like all of the pieces of me.
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: And this is specifically, I want to share this especially for the Latino coaches that are listening or like that are interested in making a lot of money with their coaching. That this is what we're used to assimilating. Which means you're like editing yourself, you know, you’re tone policing yourself, right?
And then pair that with being brought up as a Latina. There's a lot of like, I'm going to like say some phrases a little bit in Spanish. Don't bother people, like no molestes right? It’s like don't bother people. What are people going to think?¿que va a pensar la gente? And don't say anything, no digas nada. It's like all of those things are the total opposite of how you make lots of money.
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: Like how you make lots of money, and so this is something I've learned as I've been pursuing seven figures. And I just like, I have to share it. In order to make lots of money it's the total opposite of that. It's the vanilla doesn't make money, right? Like, this is one of my biggest takeaways.
Brooke: That is fact, yes.
Brenda: Yeah, vanilla doesn't make money. Like, you have to stand out. You have to allow like, yes, people will have opinions. You got to speak, you got to write, you got to make that post. So it's the very opposite of it. So, you know, it's like, for me, I found myself I got to flex that muscle on purpose, on purpose, on purpose, because it’s the total opposite of what my default has been for my whole life, really.
Brooke: Yes. And this is exactly what you and I were talking about earlier, is when you learn something and then you bring all of you to it. Including all the parts that maybe you were downplaying in order to assimilate, in a well-intended way. Not even realizing that you may be denying your own superpower parts of you that you need to bring to the forefront. And yes, people will judge you. It will happen. People will tell you to stop saying this, what will people think? Like they will say all that stuff to you.
And if it's part of what you were trained up in, in terms of those messages it's going to take some work to undo them, but it's absolutely worth it. I love this message. So good. You just said you made $500,000, which is extraordinary. And you're still actively working on all of this stuff, yes?
Brenda: Oh totally. Yeah, I mean, last month I made 70k, which is super exciting. Like that was a big breakthrough for me. And I'm very much on purpose saying numbers on this conversation today. Because I'm like, I want everyone to hear it.
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: And I want to be an example of it. Because in LCS no Latina has made seven figures. I mean, I'm like really committed to it. And any other women of color, right? Yeah. So that was last month. And so I’m on that trajectory, I plan to make much more. But I think that can apply to anything. It doesn't have to be money related, it can be related to all kinds of [crosstalk].
Brooke: But how are you dealing with the fact that people will listen to this and have thoughts?
Brenda: I'm actually just excited. I don't, I mean, I'm just not thinking about... Right now I'm not thinking about the people that might have, I'm just excited because this is important to me. And so I don't care if people have thoughts.
Brooke: Yes. Yes, and listen, if you're listening to Brenda, and you feel like I want to be there, like she wasn't always there. Right?
Brenda: Yeah.
Brooke: You know, many of us start at a place where we're worried what other people will think of it. We don't want people to think we're bragging. We don't want people to think that we've sold out. We don't want people to think that we don't care about anything but money. Like there's a lot that comes up. Making money and changing generational wealth is for courageous people. So I'm so proud of you, I'm so excited for you.
Brenda: Thank you.
Brooke: I have no doubt you’re going to get there.
Brenda: Yeah, I want to add one more thing. I wasn't always there. This is very true. And also, there's been a lot of asking, and asking again, and trying, and trying again.
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: I mean, I was on your podcast when you did a panel for making seven figures. And I was in the millionaire mentoring, and I didn't make seven figures. And I'm also still very proud of myself because I’m just going to keep on trying.
Brooke: Yes, absolutely. The difference between people that succeed and the people that don't is they just don't quit, they just keep going. And, you know, your example of not getting into master coach training and then being like, “Excuse me, a mistake has been made. I'm right here and this is going to happen.” And asking for what you want and going after it and never giving up. And that's why, with that spirit that you have, I know, I have like zero doubt that we’ll be having –
Brenda: Yeah, I was actually telling Judith and our other lovely amazing colleagues here that I am so in love with the way that I'm going to make my seven figures because of just like how everything has evolved and happened. Like I'm going to make it in this way that now I'm like, “Oh no, we're going to like make this whole community. Like let's a lot of Latinas make a lot of money.”
Brooke: Yes please, let's go. I love it. So good. All right, Esperanza, what do you have for us? Tell us, about an obstacle.
Esperanza: You know, the obstacle that you really helped me with, Brooke, when I found you was really leaning into the capacity to have. So my whole life I've been the underdog. I had to work really hard. Even when I was in the military against my peers I remember failing that first time, and then every waking moment I would work and work and work so that I could never feel that again. I just wanted to get better, but I knew that I always had to put in the extra time.
Brooke: Yeah.
Esperanza: But that wasn't a problem for me because I realized, I was like, “Okay, I'm responsible for these results. No one is just going to give me anything.” And this is even back when I was making, I mean in 2011, Brooke, I made $14,000. I was on welfare, going to school, taking care of my kids, just trying to do the best that I could.
So when I leaned into responsibility back then I was like, “It's up to me.” And I had this burning desire like, you know, when you see Rachel Hollis, right? And I was like, “It's up to me, I can go first and teach people what's possible, especially for my people. The people that are going to have the connection for me.”
Because I feel like, sometimes when you're working on something really big, like you're looking around like I was, and you don't see anybody out there doing it, that possibility just becomes diminished a little bit. Like that doubt can start to creep in because you don't have evidence of someone that looks like you doing it.
Brooke: Yes.
Esperanza: So for me, like when I fully stepped into the model of responsibility, I was like, “Okay, I can create anything.” And then I was like, “Oh man, I would know I made it if I make $50,000.” So when I went active duty, I made $50,000, and I felt like I was a millionaire. Like no one in my family had ever made that kind of money, 50 grand. So along this way of $14,000, $20,000, $50,000, $80,000. And then when I left the army my salary was $120,000. It was building the capacity to have, but not just to have it, but to feel safe having it. To be in integrity making money.
Brooke: Yes.
Esperanza: Like it's okay to do it.
Brooke: Yes.
Esperanza: And I had to do a lot of work on it’s safe. Because at first, I was like, “This is too much money. Nobody in my family has ever had this. Let me give it.” And I would be very generous in giving it because it didn’t feel safe to me. And when you taught me about the capacity to have. And then I put it’s safe, it really clicked. And not only did I create more money, I was also able to be incredibly generous along the way. But not to the point, it wasn't out of guilt, it was out of like so much love for being able to do something like that.
Brooke: Yes, yes. And this is something, when I talk to dudes about this they do not understand as much as I think women do, the capacity for us to have. This is real work that we need to do to feel as if we can have as much money as we want with absolutely zero apology, and with zero guilt. And that is work worth doing for our own self esteem. So I love that you brought that up. That's beautiful.
Esperanza: Thank you. Absolutely. And that's one of the things that I work on with my clients. And I really just, you know, one of my prayers that I ask God is let people see possibility and need in all of us here and all of us listening. Possibility in us for them.
Because we're talking about, like Maggie said, we're the after. But, you know, we were definitely starting where they were. Like me, high school dropout on welfare, thinking I made it big at 50,000. And like all of that work that comes. But this is really like such a beautiful way for us to create a legacy and not just a ripple, but like the whole damn ocean for all of the generations that come.
Brooke: Well, and that's why a podcast like this is so important for us to do because I think there's a lot of Latino women, Latino men even, that are looking at our industry, which is very white, right? And saying what Judith was even thinking without even being aware of it, “Oh, that's not for me.” Right?
And you all showing your examples and showing what you've done and what you've created and how far you've come. Someone can see that and be like, “Wait.” Right? “She was on welfare. Wait, you know, she was homeless.” And look at, you know, just because you're not there now, doesn't mean it's not a possibility for you. And so even if just one person listens to this podcast, just one, right? Like, that's the honor of a lifetime for me.
And I know for all of you, just to see someone who looks like you, which I have learned, you know, my education over this past year, I've learned is so important for us. I mean, even for me as a woman, like where was our Tony Robbins, right? It's like we had Oprah but I wanted to be the Tony Robbins of life coaching. There wasn't somebody to look up to. And so the more that we can create generations of successful people to be examples to other women I'm all fucking in.
Esperanza: Oh yes.
Brooke: It's awesome.
Esperanza: And one thing I know, Brooke, my younger sister, she's 21. And I texted my sister to chat this morning and I had set the intention out to meet you and be on this podcast last summer on my impossible goals list. And I had no idea how I was going to do it. It didn't matter to me, you know, because I could see it and I was like, “It doesn't matter how.” So I told them like, “I'm going to meet and be on the podcast with Brooke Castillo today.” And she says, “Who is that?” And I was like, “Oh Destiny. Think Tony Robbins times 1 million billion, times fire. That's who Brooke Castillo is.”
Brooke: Oh, that's awesome. Thank you. Who is that, what do you mean? Come on people. All right, Monica, what about you?
Monica: Well, for me, I'm thinking as Maggie said, it's like, just be here. I mean, just be here. For me, I remember the time being in the certification, doing this process. For me, I know that it's also some thoughts that we have, maybe it's cultural. Or like I remember this feeling of being like intimidated by the language. And also my thoughts of, “They know more than me, they are better than me, they're like, there are more prepared than me.” And for me, just now being here with you, with all you ladies and with you, Brooke, is like unbelievable.
Also, really, I feel so proud of myself, like I can't believe it. It’s like I could just stay and be okay with my life, which was okay. But just to pursue my dream, and to speak up, and to believe in me and believe that my passion is important.
Brooke: Yes.
Monica: Like I really have something important to share. But yes, I talk about love and patience. But it's just giving the importance to me, it's like everything. I mean, now I'm here and it looks like, and I know my clients, they are like, “Oh, yes, but you are...” It’s like, “Stop it, I know perfectly what it’s being in the other side.” And that's some work that I'm doing, and, you know, it's not about the other people is just about my thoughts. Just believing in me.
And I love to continue doing this. And I'm super excited to continue growing. And to be an example. For example, I think in my daughters, they are now in college. And they have this mindset, you know that we have to work really hard, which is true. We want to work hard. But for me it's like, “Girls, just watch this. You can do whatever the most –
Brooke: That’s her book title. That's a good book title, Girls, Watch This. How do you say that in Spanish? That's your book title.
Monica: Mira esto.
Brooke: Yes, let’s go.
Monica: Mira esto and I feel super proud. I know that they also have a lot of fun. And all of them are like, “Oh mom, now what?” Because I could stay there and I could have a lot of friends who think, ‘Why do you bother?”
Also, for example, for me it's like working eight hours from home was like, impossible, there is no way. Everybody here used to need me. Or sometimes my thought, I remember, my thought is like they don't respect me. And I remember in that coaching class like, “They don't respect you or you are not respecting yourself and your mission?”
So, all what I'm doing, just being here, being part of this is, well a lot of obstacles behind. And I'm willing to face more obstacles, of course, continue growing and continue with this. So proud of this. I'm so thankful, again, thank you. I love you.
Brooke: Yes, well thank you for being an example for us. I feel like your enthusiasm, your excitement, like even though you were scared and challenged to go through the training and to experience what you did. And the training is not easy, and to be doing it in a different language and wanting to show up and do it in a different language is not an easy thing to challenge yourself to do. So I love the example that you're setting for everyone listening. So I'm stoked you're here too. All right, Judith.
Judith: What's up?
Brooke: What’s up?
Judith: What’s up girl?
Brooke: Judith and I are always flirting with each other.
Judith: We are.
Brooke: You have to look at the video o go to thelifecoachschool.com/364 so you can see Judith’s amazing outfit and hair and eyebrows.
Judith: I have my eyebrow game on point because I knew I was going to see you.
Brooke: You did, and then you were just moving it in a way that... Okay, tell us.
Judith: Tell you what?
Brooke: Obstacle, tell us one obstacle you overcame.
Judith: One obstacle I overcame. You know, this is more recent but this is really important. Within the last year and all that happened in, you know, America and all the new awareness that a lot of people have had, I had to come through my own awareness. And I hadn't realized that I had internalized so many ideas about what it means to be like a brown girl or a chubby brown girl.
And I remember this sort of came to me, it was like all these coaching scenarios that I had and It's like all this came together, and it was like a conglomeration of Kara Loewentheil’s words to me and your words to me. And then it filtered through my own brain and it was just like, “What if people don't need you to be, you know, Brooke Lite or Tonya Leigh Lite? What if we need the fat Puerto Rican chick version of what you're teaching?
Brooke: Hell yeah.
Judith: And it was just like, “Oh shit.” And what if it means I can teach style, and transformation, and self-image? And I can use big giant words because I am a lawyer, while also bringing in my regular vernacular and say random ass things to people and curse like a sailor, while still loving on them and being animated and extra as fuck and dramatic, while having vintage hair. Like why not? Right, why the hell not?
Brooke: And of course, that's what you have to do immediately.
Judith: Right, exactly.
Brooke: That's what we all want, right? Isn't like so crazy, it's like we try to be these lite versions of what's already out there. And we miss you.
Judith: Yeah. And the more I stepped into just being me, and overcoming, obviously, a lot of thoughts about, “How is this going to be perceived? Oh no, maybe I shouldn't have been so extra. Maybe I should tone it back. Maybe the hair is a little drag-esque.” Right? All this like flood of thoughts. But that was the obstacles overcoming my own constant mind trash of all these like internalized ideas of how I'm supposed to be, how I'm supposed to look, how I'm supposed to sound in order to be considered credible, or intelligent, or well spoken.
And even writing my book, I have a whole section on talking about, you know, the word fuck, and using it artfully. And that there's a way to do it with art. And I was like, “Here it is. Here's the unlocking, more unlocking of if I can talk about using a well-placed fuck and also talk about being charming and lady like, I feel like I finally entered more, like really the message here is like getting back to just allowing myself to be myself.
Brooke: Yes. And I think that's the message like I want to always be giving to everyone. And showing up completely as you is the only way you can ever find out truly who you are. Because if somebody likes you, and you're some diluted version of you, you know that. They don't even really like you. But when you show up and people like you for who you really are and people hate you for really who you are, you have solid ground to stand on.
Judith: Yeah.
Brooke: Because you're telling the truth about who you are. And I have seen you kind of bloom into this. And I think that's why everyone keeps telling me how much they love you, right? Because they're actually getting to meet the real you.
Judith: Yeah, no, totally getting to meet the real me. And I have to admit, like some, like a few hundred people and I'll say some random shit. And I'm like, “Did I just say broke ass panties on Self Coaching Scholars? Like to everybody and their Mama?” Right? Yep, I did it, I went for it.
Brooke: Check.
Judith: I don’t have to worry about saying it because it's already been said, here we go. And I was like, “Broke ass panties.” I mean, I had a clap and everything.
Brooke: We’re like some complaints were filed in Self Coaching Scholars today.
Judith: That’s amazing. But really, then I got hundreds of DMs about people talking about their wedgies and the proverbial broke ass panties in their life and how this was life changing and a game changer.
Brooke: Yes, yes please.
Judith: For the few people who are not resonating, cool, cool. Like one heart and one mind at a time. That's what I really, really believe.
Brooke: Yes.
Judith: If I touch one heart, one mind, and I love them up, and now they're free to go do whatever they need to do, buy some new panties or whatever it is like their life is forever changed. They can’t undo that now.
Brooke: And your life, yes.
Judith: And my life is changed, yes. Because I showed up as me today.
Brooke: Yeah.
Judith: Incredible.
Brooke: And listen, if you want to reduce the anxiety in your life, just be yourself without apology. And include all of it, include your history, all the stuff you're ashamed of in your past, all the things that you've done to try not to be yourself. That's all part of it. So I think you articulate that so beautifully. I hope everyone listening hears that. Like being yourself is much more risky, but it's also you get to feel so much more freedom, right? Because you get to stand behind and have your own back and be who you are.
Okay, I want people to be able to hire you all. Let's start with you, Judith, if I want to hire you, first of all, what do I hire you for? And where do I go to do it?
Judith: So you hire me for style masterclass. It's my total transformation, it's amazing, I actually like transform your complete style makeover, inside out. I'm like little glam squad in one. I shop for you, so we eliminate that drama. I help you get a properly fitted bra, because that's where we start.
Brooke: Please.
Judith: And each part of the way as we're transforming your wardrobe, we're transforming how you see yourself. So you actually end the program a completely different woman. Which is sort of more of yourself, like I introduce you to yourself again, it's delicious.
So if you want to sign up for style masterclass you can go to judithgaton.com, J-U-D-I-T-H-G-A-T-O-N.com and just click on the button that's in the hero image, you can't miss it.
Brooke: Hey y'all, you're welcome. Go check out Judith. And obviously, I'm going to put everyone's URL in the show notes. So if you go to thelifecoachschool.com/364 you can get access to those links as well. Okay, what about you, Monica?
Monica: Well, they can find me in monicasosa.com, or my podcast is Puedes Hacerlo. What I do is I have a weight loss coaching program, it’s all in Spanish. I can coach one on one in English, but my program and my community is all in Spanish. It’s losing weight through a super combo of patience, love, self-love, and determination. It’s like just transformational.
Brooke: Love it. Okay, Esperanza.
Esperanza: Yes, you can find me at Lebron coaching. I am a general life coach, and I also do some business coaching. One of the things that I just quickly wanted to add in that really goes with the work that I do, I believe that vulnerability leads to greatness. And so if you're willing to feel anything, you can have anything.
Brooke: Yes.
Esperanza: So my work is breaking possibility open together. So that is my one-on-one practice. And then I also do RTT for life coaches. It is something that you can get on demand. And you can work on your confidence and your money beliefs at the subconscious level, versus the conscious level of the work that we're doing as life coaches already. So again, that's at lebroncoaching.com.
Brooke: Love it. Brenda.
Brenda: All right, well you can find me at brendalomeli.com. I have my Last 10 program, where really as I said earlier, what I help my clients do is put an end to their struggle with weight and food and create results they love on their own terms defined by them. So it's like the most empowering, comprehensive program where you can address it all. And also, Brooke, I want to share with everyone our URL for latinxcoaches.com.
Brooke: Yes.
Brenda: So Judith and I, as I mentioned, also in 2020, I told Judith this before but I guess I'll profess it publicly. Sign me up, or what did I say? Add me to the list of people that love Judith, right? During 2020, which there was a lot going on, my thought but whatever, let's just go with that. There was a lot going on.
Brooke: That’s a C, that is a C.
Brenda: Okay, let's do it. If Brooke approves then it's a C. Okay. So in 2020, I told you that one of the most worth it things that came out of it was that it for me, got Judith and I really connected and like talking about things that we felt were important that, well, let's be real, I first started off complaining and crying. We were like, “Oh my gosh.” So many tears and so much complaining.
But of course, because it's me and Judith, like it was never going to stay there. It was always going to grow into something amazing. And this is why it's always so worth it to be curious about all the emotions and things that are going on. But we were like, “We want to start a conversation. And we want to start a community. And we want there to be a support for the coaches that self identify as Latino.” Because we didn't feel that there was that for us. And so we were like, “Then let's create it.”
And so we created a directory, so you can find that at latinxcoaches.com. And basically, for any coaches that self identify as Latino, you can go there and add yourself to the directory. But then also for everyone listening, go there and find a coach. Because like that’s the purpose and that way we are creating community to support and encourage each other. Because our mission is to support each other and Latinx coaches making tons more money. So if you're a coach go there and add yourself to the directory. And everyone else go there and hire a coach.
Brooke: Love it. Love it. And you guys need to go to Brenda's site and see her before and after pictures.
Brenda: Oh, actually, I wanted to say something about that too. So I just updated my website, Brooke, it's like the copy and everything is more amazing than ever. But I have to tell everyone that Judith worked with me to style me for those. And it was like one of the most amazing coaching experiences that I've had. So another shout out to Judith.
Judith: I have a secret underground niche, don't tell anybody.
Brooke: Oh my goodness, styling. Judith will style you for your website
Brenda: That was so fun.
Brooke: A whole new revenue stream. That's awesome. All right, Maggie, how do we come and get help with our marriage?
Maggie: So my program is called the marriage MBA.
Brooke: Oh, that's amazing.
Maggie: Isn't it good? It's the Marriage Mindset Breakthrough Activator. And the thought behind it is you will learn how to activate breakthroughs whenever you want to have one. And it's a six-month program. And there are three buckets, perspective, partnership, and pleasure. If you're going through anything in your relationship right now, when we distill it down one of those buckets is off. And we help you learn how to do something in each of those buckets.
Brooke: I'm like, “I want the pleasure bucket. Can we just sign up for?” Now wait, let me ask you this. So you don't work with couples together or you work with –
Maggie: No, I work with individual women.
Brooke: Okay, just the wives.
Maggie: Just the wives, and it's amazing. Because as you know, and as we all know, when we manage our minds the people in our lives react to our upgraded approach. And it looks like magic, but it's really coaching.
Brooke: Love it.
Maggie: And my website is maggiereyes.com.
Brooke: It’s R-E-Y-E-S.com
Maggie: Yes.
Brooke: Again, I'm going to put everyone, you'll be able to access all their information from the show notes on the Life Coach School site. Look them up on Instagram, follow them, these women are going places. How fun was this you all? Thank you so much for coming on the podcast.
Maggie: So much fun. Thank you, Brooke.
Judith: Thank you for hosting us. Thank you, thank you.
Brooke: I want to thank Brenda and Judith for suggesting this. And I'm so stoked that you did because this was a Blast. And I really do think this is going to help so many people that are listening. So go to all their websites, hire them, follow them. We're going places my friends. I love you guys so much. Have a beautiful rest of day. Talk to everyone next week. Take care.
Maggie: Bye.
Esperanza: Bye.
Judith: Bye.
Monica: Thank you.
