Video: Weight Loss
So many of your clients and so many of you want to lose weight but have unrealistic expectations about weight loss. Join in as Brooke Castillo from The Life Coach School talks about exploring and understanding why you want to lose weight and the importance of being realistic about what it can do for you.
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Hi, it's Brooke Castillo from The Life Coach School and today I want to talk to you about weight loss.
I know that so many of your clients, so many of you want to lose weight. What I always like to ask my clients right when they tell me, "I really want to lose fifty pounds" or "I really want to lose twenty pounds" or ten pounds, whatever, I always ask them why. I can always tell that the answer is this padded answer. I say, "No, really, what is the real reason why you want to lose weight?" I think a lot of times we don't really think about, I don't know, why do I want to lose weight? We just think we should lose weight. We think our life will be way better. I decided to create a tool called Better, Same, and Worse Worksheet. This has been such a powerful worksheet to run through with my clients who want to lose weight because what I have found is that a lot of times they have an unrealistic expectation about what weight loss will do for them.
The truth is, weight loss can do what weight loss can do. It can make you a smaller size, it can make you weigh less, it can make it easier to shop in regular stores. That's pretty much it. You might look better in a bikini, you might not. I've had clients that have lost fifty pounds that still hate the way they look in a bikini.
Let's be realistic about what weight loss can literally do. It can shrink our physical body, it can improve our health, but other than that any other benefit from losing weight is really up to you. When you think about all the things in your life that will be different when you lose weight it's actually a very short list. In fact, so many of the things will be the same. That's something that's really enlightening for my clients because what they've done without even realizing it is tagged on to this idea that weight loss will bring rainbows, and daisies, and everything will be perfect, and everyone will be nice to them, and they won't ever argue with their husband, and the kids will be well behaved. It's ridiculous how much they fantasize what will happen when they lose weight.
If they're single they'll all of a sudden have a mate that will love them for who they are, and they will get married, and they will have babies. It's this kind of over emphasis on the power of our weight so I want to make sure that when you're thinking about your weight loss you really understand the reason why you want to lose weight. When I was going through my own process with emotional eating I really thought the reason why I wanted to lose weight was so I could be happier.
Once I learned that my happiness genuinely is caused from my mind I realized that happiness was available to me at my current weight. That is something that I try and teach all of my clients. Your emotional state has nothing to do with the amount of tissue that you have on your body. Your emotional state has to do with your thinking.
For many of us it's easier for us to be happy when we're thinner because it's easier for us to think positive thoughts, but it doesn't mean that it's impossible to be happy in the body that you're currently in. I hear you and I've heard this from thousands of clients, they say to me, "I don't want to be happy in this body. If I'm happy in this body I won't ever change it" but that's not logical because what I've said to them is, "You've hated this body and you still haven't changed it so what makes you think that if you love it it will be any different?" In fact it is very different. When you are in a place of accepting your body where it is, at its current weight your desire to overeat diminishes incredibly. If you can accept your body at this weight it will be much easier for you to accept it at a lower weight. Right? We start where we are.
The other question that we ask is, "What will be worse when you lose weight?" So many of my clients have all of these fears that they're unaware of as to why they don't want to lose weight. They think, "Oh, once I lose weight then I'm just going to be terrified all the time of gaining it back. I don't want to lose weight because then I'll never be able to eat the food I love. I don't want to lose weight because that means I'll have to exercise all the time at the expense of time with my friends and family." Right? This stuff just comes up. "I don't want to lose weight because then I'll get all of this unwanted attention. I don't want to lose weight because then I'll leave my husband." I've heard that more than a dozen times from clients. These things are preventing them from losing weight and they aren't even aware of it.
What about you? Think about it. What will be better when you lose weight? Make sure you're being realistic. What will be exactly the same? What problems will you still have? What things will you still have to do? Right? What will be worse? What are you afraid of if you lose weight? Make sure that you know the answer to all those questions so when you embark on the weight loss journey you know exactly what's going on in your mind and the obstacles you need to overcome.